Total pages in book: 58
Estimated words: 56709 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 284(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56709 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 284(@200wpm)___ 227(@250wpm)___ 189(@300wpm)
As I hold her, listening for threats, I know I won’t be able to end this. Ryan might hate me, but this isn’t about hate. It’s about something else.
Closing my eyes, I see Kay in a wedding dress, elegant and full-figured. Her cheeks are flushed with pure happiness, and her belly may be already a little swollen. She’s walking toward me, smiling wider, telling me it’s not a dream. It’s happening. We’re together forever, and nothing can ever break us apart.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Kayla
Kai is acting shifty.
We’re sitting on a picnic bench near a quiet lake in Utah. The surroundings are patchy, with a few collections of trees here and there, like a giant hand sprinkled them about. Kai sits up, the sun gleaming down, his black hair glistening, and his arms huge and hot as hell in his shirt.
We haven’t talked about last night—the kissing, the steaminess, any of it. This morning, it was like it never happened, except we’re touching each other much more. Just little moments, like I’ll brush my hand against his, or he’ll casually take my hips to slide past me, and neither of us acts like it’s weird. It’s like we’re a couple already.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“Hmm,” he says, nodding as he reaches for his sandwich.
“This is a nice place,” I mutter, looking around at the deserted landscape. “A little out of the way, though. There were five other lakes we could’ve gone to.”
“Maybe I wanted the privacy.”
“Don’t want to be seen with me, huh?”
He reaches over and touches my face. This is the casual intimacy I was talking about. His palm is rough, but I like the feeling, especially the warmth tickling over my cheeks.
“If it wasn’t for…” I get it. Ryan. “I wouldn’t care,” he goes on.
I touch his hand. “Thanks.”
“You’re a beautiful woman, Kay. You’re so cute, too.”
My smile gets even wider. He’s flooding me with so many wonderful emotions that it almost hurts, like I’m over capacity. I never knew it was possible to feel this wanted.
“Cute?”
He grins. “Are you fishing for compliments?”
When he moves like he’s going to take his hand away and stop touching my cheek, I press my hand down on his, keeping him there. “Maybe I am. So what?”
His grin gets even wider. It’s nothing like the smiles he threw my way as a kid. I realize I was never much to him, just Ryan’s little sister, nothing else. He’d smile at me like… well, I was a child. Unimportant to him.
Now, he’s obsessed. Or maybe that’s me letting my desires gallop around way too enthusiastically. It seems that way when his eyes lock on me, drink me in, and his hand somehow gets warmer.
“Everything you do is cute,” he says. “Your shy smile and how your eyes get all wide and shocked. Your pout. When your cheeks get flushed. Everything, Kay.”
He trembles, then snatches his hand away. I wonder if it’s because he’s thinking about kissing me again. We haven’t done it yet today.
Natasha and I used to talk about dating. Growing up, she had a few boyfriends, and we’d discuss ways to keep them interested. Or signs they weren’t worth keeping around. Usual chat that never really applied to me because I was too crush-crazy. Nobody ever compared with Kai, but I can’t flirt with Kai. I can’t try to interest him because that would mean going out of my way to hurt Ryan. To make everything we’ve done even worse.
“It’s hard, isn’t it?” he says, watching me closely.
“What is?” I reply, making my tone all innocent.
He smirks, then nods. “Okay, Kay.”
We eat our sandwiches for a few minutes, making eye contact but not saying anything. He seems to think he’s got me all figured out. I’m waiting for him to speak first. Maybe that’s immature, but okay. Anyway, I lose.
“What’s hard, Kai?”
He grins. “I thought you were giving me the silent treatment for a while.”
“Were you devastated?”
He chuckles. It’s such a good feeling getting my man to laugh. It’s the sort of thing I never dreamed would happen back when this was just a crush.
“It’s hard…”
He pauses, some of the lightness leaving his expression.
Darkness, falling…
And now he’s all grim.
Ready to end this,
Before it can…
But it’s already begun. It’s happening. One day, we could look back on this as a seminal moment in our relationship, a core memory: he and I, the lake, and the light breeze disturbing the dusty landscape.
“Being here with you,” he says, “with nobody around.”
“What’s hard about that?”
He finishes his sandwich, then sighs. “You know why it’s hard. Don’t make me say it. If you do, I won’t be able to control myself. If I start talking about kissing you again, slipping my hand down your curvy body, grabbing those thick, gorgeous hips… If I talk about grabbing your ass and claiming it…”