Regretting You Read online J.L. Beck, Cassandra Hallman (Blackthorn Elite #4)

Categories Genre: Angst, Dark, Erotic, New Adult, Romance Tags Authors: , Series: Blackthorn Elite Series by J.L. Beck
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Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 65552 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 328(@200wpm)___ 262(@250wpm)___ 219(@300wpm)
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“You know why,” I say before forcing myself out of the vehicle.

Kennedy takes a minute to get herself together but climbs out as well, walking around the car to meet me. It’s time for me to settle the score. It’s time for Kennedy to pay the piper.

10

Kennedy

As I step into his apartment, all I can think of is what he said in the car.

You know why.

Yes, I know why he wants me to come in, but how am I going to get it into his head that it’s not happening? I’m not giving him a blow job. I can’t. I’ll do anything else, but not that.

Walking closely behind me, Jackson closes the door once we’re both inside. His spacious living room suddenly seems smaller, like the walls are slowly moving toward us. The space is surprisingly clean for a college student.

“I’m gonna take a shower, and when I come back, you’ll be on your knees ready to suck me off–”

“No! I won’t. Either we have sex, or I’m walking home.” I shock myself saying the words out loud, but even more surprising is that I’m not scared. I’m not scared of sex with Jackson. I’d rather do that than anything else.

I’ve never actually done it, but when I was younger, I thought about him being my first. I imagined him taking my virginity, even touching myself at the thought of it. So, I’m definitely not scared of sex, I’m more worried about him turning me down.

When he doesn’t answer right away, I look back at him over my shoulder. I’m not really sure what I expected to find when I looked at him, but the shocked expression on his face is new. I guess he didn’t expect me to say that either.

“You want me to fuck you?” he questions in disbelief.

The tone of his voice changes. It’s lower, almost breathless, and it has some weird effect on me. I feel hot, like the temperature in the room has suddenly risen by ten degrees. There’s a tingling in my belly, and a heat creeps in that I’ve never felt before as I feel Jackson take a step closer. His scent surrounds me, and I feel a calmness wash over me. I can breathe, feel… the weight on my chest isn’t so heavy right now.

“I asked you a question, bug. Is that what you want? Do you want me to fuck you?” he repeats, and all I can do is nod because the apple-sized knot in my throat won’t let a single word pass. Before I can change my mind and tell him no, he is on me. His muscled chest bumps into my back, and his fingers wrap around my upper arms as he shoves me forward and into the room.

Oh, god, it’s really happening.

“Fine, I’ll fuck you,” he growls venom in his words as he bends me over the back of the couch, pushing my face into a pillow. This isn’t how I imagined this would go the first time, but I’m not about to try and stop him. Keeping one hand between my shoulder blades to hold me in place, he uses his free hand to pull down my yoga pants and panties in one go.

Cool air hits my exposed center, and I realize that I’m already wet. My cheeks heat and a shiver runs down my spine as I anticipate what’s going to happen next.

Is he really going to do it? Is it going to hurt? Will it feel good? I wonder if I’m wet enough or if he plans to touch me?

All these questions swirling in my mind come to a stop when I feel his fingers between my thighs. Gently he strokes my folds, moving his fingers to my clit. Rubbing tiny circles against it, pleasure, like I’ve never experienced before, erupts from the tiny bundle of nerves, and I have to bite my lip to muffle a moan.

“You’re already wet for me, bug,” he says, his voice is so low and soft, it’s barely recognizable.

He never talks to me softly anymore. Everything about him now is harsh, domineering. Leaning in, he presses his chest against my back, molding us together, letting me feel his erection on my naked bottom. He’s still wearing his shorts, but the thin material doesn’t do much to hide how hard he is.

“How long have you been thinking about me fucking you?” he questions. His voice is barely above a whisper now, but the words are enough to make more moisture form under his touch. The truth is, I’ve thought about this for a long time. Wanted it since before everything fell apart. It was always going to be Jackson, always. I wanted him to be the one to take my virginity. Jackson doesn’t wait for my reply.

Maybe he knows I’m past words, or maybe he doesn’t care to hear my response. I don’t know. What I do know is he pulls away, his fingers between my legs disappear, and a moment later, they are replaced with the smooth tip of his cock.


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