Total pages in book: 158
Estimated words: 145803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 729(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 145803 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 729(@200wpm)___ 583(@250wpm)___ 486(@300wpm)
With the gentleness that got to her heart every time, Zale turned her to him and lifted her chin. “Snowflake, I know you’ll be worried about me when I have to leave. I’ll be worried about you. We’ll find a way to make it work. We’ll have to.” The pad of his thumb slid gently over the curve of her bottom lip. “I’m not willing to go without news of you and how you’re doing, and I won’t want you worried. If I’m injured, I’ll get word to you somehow. Those are things we can work out.”
“Are you really going to retire when your contract’s up, or are you going to be like Rainier?” That was another burning question. In her opinion, Rainier, as gifted and experienced as he was, shouldn’t remain in the field. She wondered if he was looking to die that way. Or if he wanted to climb up a political ladder. Was there one in their field? She didn’t know or even care.
“We’ve gone over this, Vienna. Where is this coming from? Why are you suddenly doubting us all over again? I told you I would get out . . .”
“Yes.” She pounced on that. “You said you would get out, but not that you wanted out. There’s a difference. A huge difference. Sam was ready to get out. He’d made that decision on his own. I don’t want you to leave a career you love for me. Eventually you would resent me. You know you would.”
“Snowflake, stop. I don’t do anything I don’t want to do. I wouldn’t get out if I didn’t want to. You’ll learn that about me, but for now, you’ll just have to take my word. I know you’re worried I’ll get bored. I’ve looked Yosemite over and there are all kinds of things to do there. It’s the kind of country I need to live in. I don’t foresee a problem living there with you and raising a family. If something comes up that I didn’t foresee, we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”
She heard the sincerity in his voice, and it settled the fears that kept blindsiding her. “I don’t know why I can’t stop this issue from coming up.”
“You warned me it would, and I’m okay with reassuring you as long as you always give me the chance.”
* * *
• • •
Late that night, after the most relaxing day swimming in the pool, laughing with her friends, eating the best meals, staying up late drinking just a little too much although they had to get up early, Zale snuck into her room and crawled into bed with her. He was voracious, the way he always seemed to be with her. Vienna was equally as demanding, and he was receptive every single time.
The dream woke her, her breath catching in her lungs, the memories pouring in. You can never trust them, Vienna. They’ll lie to you every time to get what they want and then they’ll walk away, leaving you shattered and broken.
Don’t tell her that, Avril.
It’s true. You know it’s true. I thought he loved me. He said he didn’t do babies and he’d pay for me to get rid of her. That we could still see each other after if I wanted, but he was working on his career. He thought I understood that. We never even discussed his career. When I said I wouldn’t consider abortion, he said I was on my own.
He wasn’t the right one, Avril. Not all men are like that.
They are. Every single one of them. I don’t want her to ever feel like this. Not ever. Look at me now. Broken and alone. If I didn’t have you, Mitzi, what would happen to her? I’d die and she’d go into the system.
I love her. You know I do. I’ll take care of her. I want it to be legal, though, so he can never come back on me.
I have an insurance policy. It isn’t much, but it will help for a while. He’ll send money if you ask for it.
I don’t want anything from him. He didn’t want her. Just get him to sign his rights away.
I asked the lawyer to do that a long time ago.
Vienna closed her eyes. Her birth mother. Avril. She remembered her vaguely. How old had she been when Avril had passed away? Avril had whispered her mantra to her over and over for years. They can’t be trusted. They lie to you. They’ll say anything they think you want to hear in order to get their way.
It had been her birth mother instilling her deep fear of a real relationship, rocking her as an infant and toddler, whispering what she believed to be a truth to protect her daughter. Mitzi had tried to stop her, so she’d just stopped doing it in front of her. Vienna knew that kind of indoctrination at such an early age could be extremely difficult to overcome.