Total pages in book: 124
Estimated words: 115525 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 578(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115525 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 578(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
Wood.
“Rayne, you in there? I thought you were out running. Umm… did you just get back?”
“I’ll be out in a second,” he answered, turning the water off before he was able to rinse all of the suds away. He hurried to towel off because if one of his roommates needed the bathroom, he wasn’t about to hog it.
Wood probably assumed Rayne had been out on his sunrise run and thought it was safe to get vocal with his boyfriend this morning. He knew Wood would never make him uncomfortable on purpose, but he’d be lying if he said that it wasn’t difficult to hear. Most days, Rayne left the trailer around 6:00 a.m. as quietly as possible to give Wood and Trent the privacy they were accustomed to before he came along. He’d only been staying there a couple of weeks, and he wasn’t trying to mess up the one good thing in his life, so he tried to make himself small and unnoticeable.
He would’ve done his run today if he hadn’t been exhausted, his feet aching from pounding the pavement from 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. yesterday, searching for employment. Rayne needed to pay his own way, or else his idiot mind would conjure up much easier ways for him to pay his share. But those ways were no longer an option. He would search again today, all day if that’s what it took to find something. His last legit job was at Walmart, but he’d lost it for cursing out an old hookup who’d offered him a better job at his marketing firm if Rayne would accompany him back to his condo and spend the weekend with him.
That was how he’d survived the last twenty years of his life, using his eyes, his voice, his charm, and especially his body to get not just what he needed, but also whatever the hell he wanted, to the point that it had become an obsession. He thought he was winning at life by using rich bastards, taunting them with amazing sex, and then draining them for all he could, but it wasn’t until he’d gotten arrested four years ago with the manager of a Bloomingdale’s for public indecency that he realized he had a problem. He’d sold his dignity and freedom for a Burberry wardrobe and Gucci boots. And now, Rayne had a disease that he didn’t know existed until it was too late, and it had wreaked havoc on his life. He’d had no idea what sex addiction was until he’d hit rock bottom and had dragged a lot of innocent people down with him.
Since Rayne’s first arrest, he’d had his ups and downs on his road to recovery, far more down than up. His last release from jail was a little over eleven months ago. It took a while before he believed he could manage the steps of the program and maintain his celibacy. And he had, and he’d never been prouder of himself. Regardless that he had to hock pieces of his beautiful jewelry to pay for his own necessities, it felt good, like an accomplishment that he was taking care of himself. He didn’t have to pay with his body anymore. Besides, it wasn’t as if the men who gave him those jewels meant anything to him. They’d all been disposable pawns in his schemes.
Sometimes, Rayne hated the lonely, helpless feeling that would wash over him when he caught glimpses of what genuine love looked like, sounded like. Being around Trent and Wood made him flush warm all over and not in a pleasant way. It was a hollow ache that started in his throat and ended in his groin.
Rayne hurried and wrapped the towel around his lower waist and cinched his terry cloth robe over his navel. Wood was coming out of his room at the same time Rayne opened the door to the bathroom. There was no mistaking the satisfied expression on his roommate’s face or the way his gray-and-black hair was a tousled mess as if it had been grabbed and tugged repeatedly.
Rayne craved that kind of irresistible love more than anything, and doing so caused an ache to intensify deep inside of him. Would he ever know that feeling? Who the fuck would trust him with their heart, to be a faithful partner… a sex addict?
“Rayne, are you all right?” Wood said, coming closer, smelling of lust and bed linen.
“Yeah, sure,” he lied. Rayne hadn’t realized he’d stopped in front of his bedroom door until Wood tried to inch past him in the tight confines of the narrow hallway.
“Cool.” Wood managed to get by, but before he could close himself in the bathroom, Rayne’s soul screamed out for help.
“Actually… Wood.”
“Yep.” He popped his head back out the door.
“Do you have to go to the shop this morning? I was hoping you could maybe…”