Total pages in book: 137
Estimated words: 138683 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138683 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
Her lips barely parted as we sat there with an inch of space separating us.
Hovering.
Hesitating.
Unsure.
My heart thundered too loud, and I finally drew her the rest of the way in and pressed my lips to hers.
Somewhere between firm and soft.
A second.
Then two.
Breathing her in.
Torment and bliss.
Scout cracked up at our side, and I closed my eyes for a second more, relishing in it, in what I couldn’t have, before I forced myself back a fraction to look his way.
“You do got the love bug, Dad. Miss Longmier said it was a horrible disease,” he giggled around his Popsicle.
I glanced back at Tessa, who withdrew, timidly licking her lips as she sat back.
My dick stirred.
I wanted to kiss her again.
Guilt cleaved through my spirit at the errant thought, but I didn’t have time to fully contemplate it before a voice cleared, bursting the bubble we’d built.
“It’s time to go,” Paula said, barely controlling the spite in her voice.
“Oh, man, already? I just got my Popsicle,” Scout complained.
Sadness rushed from Remy, and in an instant, she had moved and was clinging to me. It was the same way she always did when it was time to say goodbye.
I held her tight, one arm around her waist and my other hand spread over the back of her head while she buried her face in my chest.
I was caught in her pain, in the hatred that burned from Paula, in the sympathy that radiated from Tessa.
“Finish it up quickly.” Paula pursed her lips in disdain when she glanced at where I was on my knees hugging Remy.
Scout took it as a challenge, though half of it melted on his face and dripped down onto his shirt.
When he finished, we all reluctantly stood.
Somberness stole the mood as Tessa and I packed our things.
Tessa held onto the blanket while I carried the cooler back across the park.
Scout and Remy walked along at either side of us. Scout prattled on, thankfully unaware of the melancholy that had descended.
Paula and Gene were already waiting by their car. We set everything on the sidewalk, and a sticky disquiet crawled over us as we walked the kids to the parking lot.
Remy took Tessa in a fierce hug.
“I’m really glad I got to meet you today. It was so fun,” she whispered, like she needed to keep it a secret.
Tessa gently ran her hand down the back of her head before she eased back so she could meet her eye. “It was one of my most favorite days I’ve ever had.”
An affected smile tweaked Remy’s mouth before it dimmed, and she moved to throw herself around me. She burrowed into me as I held her close.
I nearly buckled when I felt her crying.
How many times could my soul shatter before there was nothing left that existed?
I eased her back, tipped up her chin, held it between my thumb and forefinger. “It’s okay, Remy Girl. I’ll see you next week.”
One side of her face tremored as she tried to hold her sorrow back. “Okay.”
“I love you.”
She nodded, the words whispered directly into my chest when she squeezed me again. “You’ve got love, Dad, and I love you back so much.”
She finally peeled herself away and climbed into the back of the SUV.
I picked up Scout and flung him around a little, making him laugh before I pulled him against my chest, holding him as tight as I could without crushing him. “You be a good boy, Scout. I’ll be thinking about you.”
“Every single second.” He grinned.
“That’s right.” I pressed a kiss to his temple.
Paula all but ripped him out of my arms, scowling at me as she buckled him into his car seat.
“He’s a mess, Milo. I’d appreciate it if you had a little consideration next time.”
Right.
Popsicles.
I was a horrible parent.
I didn’t bother responding because it didn’t matter.
There would be no getting through to her, no changing her mind, and the only way any of this would change would be fighting it out in court.
We stepped back as Paula slammed the door shut, and she rounded and got into the front passenger seat.
Gene backed out.
Tessa eased up to my side.
Energy thrummed.
Quiet.
Intense.
Sorrowful.
She threaded her fingers through mine, and together, we watched them drive away.
I’d done it for close to four years.
Stood there, alone, breaking all over again.
But this time, I did it with Tessa at my side.
This time, I did it with a spark of hope.
NINETEEN
TESSA
I set my e-reader on the nightstand. Tonight, I was unable to focus on the words that kept blurring together.
Reading romance was my jam.
I loved getting to experience the tension. The angst. The attraction. The mystery.
I loved the triumph over trauma.
I loved getting to fall in love over and over again, a million different times in a million different ways.
I wanted to experience the beauty of it rather than succumb to the numbness I’d felt lying next to a man I would never love, night after night.