Total pages in book: 136
Estimated words: 128413 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128413 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
“You made me a promise.” A harsh rasp, Auden toe-to-toe with him.
She was fucking incredible.
“I promised to take you out if you become a threat to Liberty.” Remi ran the pad of his thumb over her lower lip. “You can’t become that if I rip you the hell away from her the instant your scent changes.”
“You can’t be there all the time!”
He smiled, and knew it was a thing wild, without boundaries. “You’ll be living in a pack, Auden. I can make it so you’re never alone with Liberty if that’s what it takes to make you feel safe. Any member of the pack will grab her and run if you start to turn.”
“What if I become that other Auden forever?” Auden knew she shouldn’t have asked the question, that there was no good answer, but she pushed at the wound, wanting him to strike out, throw her away.
Remi’s words, when they came, were quiet—and slammed into her like bullets. “You might lose all your memories of us, Cupcake, but I’ll still have them. And however long you have with our tiny kitten, she’ll have them.” Claws brushing her cheek. “No matter what, your name will be carved onto our hearts for all eternity.”
She crumpled against his chest again, sinking into the protective warmth of his embrace, this man who saw all of her, and still wanted her. Why was she fighting with him? Because she was angry at herself? At her parents? At fate?
She didn’t know. What she did know was that the idea of losing her memories of Remi was as horrifying a thought as losing her memories of Liberty. Because this alpha leopard had become as much a part of her as her child, his growl, his arms, his beard-shadowed jaw safety to her.
“I’m going to write her letters,” she whispered against his chest. “While I’m still me, I’ll write her letters that I need you to keep for her if nothing we do works and I turn into the other me.”
Remi’s body went rock-hard, a block cold and jagged, but he didn’t interrupt.
“I want her to know I loved her. So much.” Her throat grew thick, her eyes burning. “I want my baby to grow up knowing she was the best thing that ever happened to me.”
Remi’s chest rumbled, his hand warm and protective as he cradled the back of her head. “She’ll know. No matter what, she’ll know.”
Sobs rocking her, Auden cried. But she only gave herself so much time, no more. Because she couldn’t break down. She had to use the time she had as herself. “While we wait for the house to settle,” she said, wiping her face on the backs of her forearms, “I’ll see what I can dig up on the system. Rina said she put my organizer with your kit.”
Remi didn’t argue—he probably saw how close she was to the edge, how much she needed to do something for her baby. “Yes.”
After retrieving it for her, he said, “I’ll duck into the bathroom and change out of this suit. Mliss handed our stuff over to Rina at the gate, so no one in your house has had a chance to embed anything in them.”
“Change here,” Auden whispered from where she sat on the bed, because the idea of seeing all that masculine beauty made her skin stretch, dulled the pain until it no longer throbbed like blades in the skin.
“You can scent me.” She used his own words against him because it had struck her all over again that her life—as Auden—could end without ever experiencing intimate touch at Remi’s hands. And this time, it wasn’t a realization she could fight, wasn’t a panic she could think away. It was too deep, too vicious. “Please be with me while I’m me. While I know you.”
“Auden. We’ve already talked about this. Anything we do, we do on our own timeline.”
“I know…but I’ve realized…I need that time to be now. I need something good to balance out the ugliness of this house, of my family, of my entire life.” She swallowed her tears, fisting her hands in the sheet. “I need you, Remi.”
“You’ve just given birth.” It came out a growl.
“I’m healed, thanks to the insane amount of money your pack blew on me.” She tried to smile at the words she’d meant to be light. “My hormones are all over the place, my emotions a huge storm, but they’re not affecting my ability to think—and while I might still be trembling from the shock of the birth, it was the most beautiful shock of my life. If I’m shaken, it’s in joy. If I’m lost, it’s only because I’m a new mother. There’s nothing bad in it.”
The tears burned her irises now. “And you. You’re the most extraordinary, wonderful shock I could’ve ever imagined—and I don’t want to miss out on knowing you in this way that’s integral to your nature. Each time I close my eyes, I’m afraid I won’t wake up as me. Please, Remi. Give me this piece of you to fight the nightmares.”