Total pages in book: 119
Estimated words: 110549 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 553(@200wpm)___ 442(@250wpm)___ 368(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 110549 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 553(@200wpm)___ 442(@250wpm)___ 368(@300wpm)
I really was a fucked up mess.
But if Jessie kept pushing me toward him, it couldn’t be too horrible of me to be with Lincoln, too, right?
I wrapped my arms around my mid-section like my arms might protect me from any harsh and hurtful words he threw my way. “I’m sorry,” I whispered.
Lincoln released a soft sigh before he turned to face me, his blue eyes locking on mine. “Nothing to be sorry for, babe,” he assured me. “You’re not ready for anything between us. I can’t be angry or upset about that.”
I drew in a deep breath. “Lincoln, I’m too fucked up for you—for this. There’s no way that you really want me. Just admit that it’s fun and games for you.”
He narrowed his eyes at me, suddenly looking a bit pissed, which put me on edge. “Shit between us has never been fucking fun and games, West,” he growled. He moved toward me until he was standing right in front of me, his muscular frame easily dwarfing mine. “Don’t ever try to fucking say that what I feel for you is just fun and fucking games.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “I want you, Lincoln, but you’re too good for my shit.” My bottom lip trembled. I drew in a shaky breath, on the verge of tears. “You can’t want someone like me. If I give in to everything between us fully, it’ll kill me when you get tired of me and walk away.”
“West, baby, I’m never walking away from you,” Lincoln rasped. He gripped my face in my hands and tilted my head back, so my eyes were forced to lock on his. “Jessie and I have talked about this. I’m not walking away from you, baby. I’m here as long as you want me,” he assured me.
“Don’t say that,” I begged him as tears flooded my eyes. “You don’t know what you’re getting into with me.”
“Then tell me, West,” he coaxed, his tone gentle. “Tell me what I’m getting into with you.”
I was so terrified of telling him. I was so scared that he would finally realize how much of a fuck-up I was and walk away from me.
I shook my head. “I can’t,” I choked out. “I can’t tell you, Lincoln.”
He brushed his thumbs over my cheeks. “West, baby, you used to be able to open up to me. I never judged you, baby,” he reminded me. “Trust me.”
I drew in a deep breath, really hoping he didn’t think I was too messed up for him once he knew. “A few months ago, I was diagnosed with Bipolar II Depression,” I told him quietly, a couple of tears sliding down my cheeks. “Some days, like today, are really hard for me, and I struggle to cope.”
Lincoln drew me into his arms. “Oh, baby,” he soothed, running his hand over my hair. Then, he kneeled and lifted me into his arms. I clung to his neck as I finally decided to cry.
I hadn’t had a damn good cry in years, and now Lincoln was about to see the really ugly parts of me very quickly.
He sat on the couch and held me on his lap. “Let it out, baby,” Lincoln said softly as he pressed a kiss to my temple. “I’m here, babe.”
So, I did. I curled against his chest and finally allowed myself to cry for everything I’d endured for the past several years.
Lincoln
I slowly opened my eyes when I heard the office door open. West was passed out on my lap, her head resting on my shoulder as she softly snored. Normally, the sound would be annoying, but from her, it just sounded adorable.
Jessie frowned when his eyes landed on West. He moved over and gently tucked her hair behind her ear, his eyes running over her face. “She cried,” he said quietly.
I swear, this man knew the woman in my arms better than anyone else. “Yeah,” I said quietly. “She told me about her diagnosis. And then she just burst into tears.”
“She trusts you,” Jessie quietly spoke as he ran the tips of his fingers over her cheek. “She’s warming up to you, Lincoln—slowly, but surely.”
“Thank fuck,” I grumbled. This thing with her could be dizzying at times. Her back and forth constantly kept me on my toes. I pressed my lips to her forehead for a moment before I looked back up at Jessie. “What time is it?”
“After closing,” he replied. “If you want to stand up and hold her, I can pull out the bed.”
I slowly stood up from the couch, being careful not to jostle West too much as I did so. She made a small sound in the back of her throat, but she otherwise stayed completely asleep. Jessie removed the cushions and pulled the bed out. “Let me grab the blanket and pillows,” he murmured.