Total pages in book: 170
Estimated words: 160166 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 801(@200wpm)___ 641(@250wpm)___ 534(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 160166 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 801(@200wpm)___ 641(@250wpm)___ 534(@300wpm)
Mostly I just feel empty inside. It’s not a good way to approach making something to eat. There’s not enough food in the world to fill that space, so it feels a little pointless to go through the trouble of cooking, or even microwaving, anything.
God. Something has to change, and soon, because this isn’t any way to live. I have come around to the idea that escaping life forever was probably not the best plan, but what am I supposed to live for now? Nobody can look forward to staying a prisoner. Not having enough information to make choices is enough to drive anybody out of their mind.
“Food,” I say to the fridge. “Focus on food.”
“You should come hang out with us.” The voice behind me startles me so much that I jump. I whip around, the handle on the refrigerator door gripped in my palm. Aria stands there in a baggy burgundy chenille sweater and skinny blue jeans. Her perfectly polished toes are black. Without an ounce of makeup on, she’s still stunning. Then there’s me in Declan’s pajama pants rolled up and a tee shirt I refuse to take off because it smells like him.
We couldn’t be more different.
I put a hand over my racing heart and take a deep breath.
Her cherry lips perk up as if it’s funny. “So do you want to?”
I don’t know what she’s talking about. “What do you mean?” Even though she’s casual and friendly even, Aria Cross scares the hell out of me. Just like Carter. She is his wife after all.
Aria shrugs. “When they leave, it can give me an anxious feeling sometimes.” She reaches across me and opens the fridge.
“They?” I turn her words over in my head. “They left together? Carter and Declan?”
“All of them,” Aria answers me. I blink, surprised, and Aria smiles gently at me. “Don’t worry, Braelynn. We’re safe here. There are guards and nothing to worry about, but I think you’d like it better if you stayed with us.”
She purses her lips, shutting the door and apparently coming to the same conclusion I did. “Did he tell you what they’re going to do?”
“No.”
She hesitates only a moment before asking, “Do you want to know?”
“I...” She has a genuine look on her face, like she might tell me if I said yes. “I don’t know. I seriously don’t.” I don’t know why I feel so disappointed in myself. I’ve never wanted to know. I never wanted to be in this life. All I wanted was him. And look where it’s gotten me.
Aria nods, understanding as I swallow down my thoughts. “Do you want to drink?”
“Yes. Yes, I do.” She passes by me grabbing a bag of fruit and nut mix, and I blurt out what I’m thinking before I can stop myself. “He lied to me.”
This time it’s shame that passes through me.
She pauses, thinking, and looks me in the eye, her gaze a mix of understanding but also one of pity. “This world is fucked up, and so are our men.”
“I don’t know how to think straight if he’s lying to me. Or why I would want to know anything if I won’t even know if it’s true.”
“Given the state he’s been in, I doubt he’ll ever lie to you again.” She nudges me gently out of the way, opens the fridge, and reaches in for an open bottle of wine. She pours us glasses while telling me I should tell Declan how much it hurts. She says he’s a lost puppy. It's hard to imagine Declan Cross like that. It’s even harder to imagine he’d listen to me. She hands one glass to me, closes the fridge with her hip, and takes a long sip from hers. The chilled glass in my hand is tempting. “Come on. Carter told me it’ll be a little bit before they’re back. I have something I want to show you.”
She doesn’t wait for me to agree before turning her back.
I follow her through to the wing of the house where Carter and Aria live. It’s warmer than I imagined it would be. The walls are a soft cream but colorful paintings line the way. Giggles reach me through the hall. Children playing, somewhere in the house. I pause when I hear them and it’s Aria’s short laugh that brings my attention back to her. Aria smiles but doesn’t look for them.
“Addison’s with them. They’re supposed to be in bed, but she spoils them so I’m pretending not to hear it for now.”
I forgot there were children here. It’s a wonder how they keep their kids separate from all of this. No one ever mentions them. It’s as if they don’t exist in the real world.
She walks gracefully through the long hallway. All the doors are painted a dark navy blue and complement the gray slate herringbone floor. Where Declan’s wing is stark and cold, this wing is lived in. Every detail of this place is beautiful. I’m intimidated by how big this place is, but Aria belongs here. It’s hers. Aria’s beautiful, and she commands authority. I can’t imagine this woman ever being afraid. Even if everything turns out all right between Declan and me, can I ever belong here? I could never be a woman like her. I still can’t imagine myself in the world I know to be run by the Cross brothers.