Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 101505 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 508(@200wpm)___ 406(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 101505 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 508(@200wpm)___ 406(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
“I know,” I say. I blink and a tear rolls down my cheek. “But it’s okay for it to hurt.”
Nolan swallows hard. “This is the only way it could be for us, Mia. It’s the only way.”
I hesitate. I could argue. I could try to convince him. But I just nod my head, fighting back more tears. “Yeah, I know,” I whisper.
29
NOLAN
“I’m gonna catch a flight to Frosty Harbor this weekend,” Jesse says. He has to raise his voice over the commotion in the bar. It’s some place across the street from the arena. About an hour ago, we just cleared the first round of the playoffs. We won the seven game series with four straight wins, shutting out our opponents.
It feels good, and we’re all in high spirits.
“I may come with you,” Jake says. “I haven’t seen Andi in a little while. I bet she’s huge by now.”
I watch him suspiciously. “Yeah?” I ask. “You sure it’s not Caroline you want to see?”
He shoots me a dirty look. “You’re one to talk. I bet you’re going to head back, too. Maybe you and Mia will disappear as soon as nobody’s looking?”
I clench my jaw. It has been several months since the offseason when I opened Taste. Several months since I was seeing Mia every day and getting her all to myself almost as often as I wanted. It was a whole regular season since we had that conversation at Taste a couple nights before I left.
Things changed after that, but not in any way I can put my finger on. I haven’t been back to the restaurant as much as I hoped during the season. But when I do manage a flight back or a drive to Frosty Harbor, I find a chance to slip away with Mia, just like Jake is saying. Only now, we hardly even talk when we’re not fucking. There’s a giant gulf that opened up between us, and neither of us seem to know how to close it.
Still, I didn’t think the fact that we were still sleeping together was so obvious.
“Fuck you,” I grumble.
“Come on, man,” Carter laughs. “You can admit it to us. You guys like each other. What’s the big deal?”
“New topic,” I say.
Jesse gives my arm a squeeze. “Come on, leave him alone, guys. Nolan just wants to go check on his restaurant.”
“Yeah,” Carter says with a crooked smile. “He wants to go back for just a little Taste. A taste of one of his employees, that is.”
I point at him. “That’s enough, asshole.”
Carter looks unbothered, shrugging. “I’m just wondering when you two are going to stop playing footsie. It has been a legendary game, though. Like you’ve seriously been keeping this up for an entire season? Impressive.”
“There’s nothing going on,” I say.
“Nothing you guys want to admit,” Jake adds.
“You’re one to talk,” I snap.
He looks away, then chugs the rest of his drink.
“But yeah,” I say after a little while. “I am going to go back. Zander says they’re having trouble with this new recipe. I want to get in there and see if I can help them figure it out.”
“Ah, yeah,” Carter says. “I think I heard you talking about that recipe. What was it called again? The hidden sausage?”
Maddox leans in. “I think Nolan just wants to show Mia how to stir the honey pot without a spoon.”
Carter nudges him, then looks at me with a smile. “He’s gonna show her how to mix the cake batter without a whisk.”
Maddox puts every bit of brain power he has to use–I can tell, because his eyes go distant and he is motionless for a few moments. “They’re doing the cheek to cheek dance. And not the cheeks on their faces.”
Carter tilts his head. “Maddox, buddy?”
“What?” he asks.
“You do know how sex happens, right? Usually, people don’t rub their butts together. You’re not rubbing butts with the girls you take home and thinking that’s sex, right? Because if you are, that’s adorable.”
Maddox punches him. “I know how sex works, asshole.”
“Yeah?” Carter asks. “Prove it.”
Maddox pauses for a long time, then looks embarrassed. “Sorry, man. We’re good friends, and all. But I don’t think I could get it up for you and do that. I just don’t think it’d be possible.”
Carter sighs. Two seconds pass, and then we all burst into laughter.
My smile fades as I think about everything–about what I’ve left unsaid in Frosty Harbor and what I still haven’t admitted. About how this thing between me and Mia is too fragile to last forever.
I’ve made a point of leaving the rink with a woman a few times this season. I let people take the pictures, then sent the girls on their way home alone. Maybe it was an asshole move, but I wanted Mia to see. I wanted her to assume the worst. I did it on the lowest nights, when I was convinced I was ruining her life by dragging this thing out. I was too cowardly to break things off myself, so I wanted to provide her the perfect excuse to cut things off with me.