Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Mom swipes away a falling tear. “I’m not making excuses, only trying to explain how it all got so out of control. Every day you went to Nick’s home, you saw the wealth and luxurious lifestyle.”
“They’re far from perfect,” I tell her. It took a long time for me to learn and understand that, but once I did, I knew I didn’t want to be anything like Nick’s parents.
“I know, but if I would’ve been giving you the love and attention you needed and deserved, you wouldn’t have grasped onto thinking what they had was the way to live…to love. I felt it, Celeste. I felt love so deep in my bones, it had the ability to rock me to the core. And when I lost it, I was so wrapped up in my heartbreak, so afraid to love again, I didn’t open myself up to let you in. You needed me, and I failed you. The truth is, had I shown you what love was, it wouldn’t have mattered if we had electric or water. It wouldn’t have mattered that I drove a shitty car, or that we lived in a rust-filled shitty trailer. Because real love is so overpowering and all-consuming it knows no bounds and overrides any hardships.”
The tears that were burning my lids, fall. I know exactly what she means because it’s the way I feel about Jase and Skyla.
“I love you.” My mom pulls me into her arms, and my head rests on her shoulder. “You don’t see it, but you would make an amazing mom because for your entire life, you’ve taken care of me. Even when you ran away, you never stopped caring for me. I gave up on life and love and lost myself, but you never once gave up on me.”
“I should’ve visited,” I tell her through my tears. “I should’ve came and got you sooner.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “You had to find yourself first, and you have through the love you found in Jase and Skyla. Now, go get your family back, pretty girl.”
* * *
My initial thought was to go see Jase first. I have a lot I need to say to him. But then after I thought about it, I decided I needed to see Skyla first. She will always come first and that starts with talking to her before I go to see Jase.
Knowing that Jase is at work—I called earlier—I call Quinn to see if Skyla is with her.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to see her,” Quinn says. “She’s been through a lot.”
“I understand, but I would just like to speak to her. You were upset that I left all those years ago without a goodbye, but now I’m here and trying to talk to her. Please.”
“You’re saying goodbye?”
“No, I’m not.” Even if Jase and I don’t end up together, I’m going to make sure Skyla and I continue our relationship, if she’ll forgive me.
“Fine, but just so you know, she doesn’t know you ran. Jase told her you had a work emergency.” Oh my heart. Of course he did. Because even when I’m failing at life, he’s right there to save me.
“Okay. Can I come over now?”
“We’re at my place. I’ll text you the address.”
* * *
I arrive at Quinn’s condo, which is in the Upper Eastside. After security lets me through, I take the elevator to the penthouse. When I step off, I notice it’s the only door on the floor. I knock once and Quinn opens the door.
“She’s in the guestroom, drawing.”
“Did you…tell Jase?”
“No, you can tell him yourself.”
“Thank you.”
The bedroom door is open, but I still knock once. Skyla turns in her chair and smiles big. “Celeste!” She runs over to give me a hug. I take a second to breathe in her scent, to lose myself for just a moment in her love. This girl is literally the best part of Jase, and if I’m honest, the best part of me. I might not be her mother, but I want her to be mine in every way that matters. We separate and she sits down on the edge of the bed.
“Dad said you’ve been busy with work.” She looks at me for confirmation, and I know I can’t lie to her. She deserves the truth.
“Actually, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.” I sit next to her. “I left that day at the hotel because I was scared.”
Skyla’s brows furrow. “Of what?”
“Of how much I love you and your dad.”
She gives me a look of confusion. “Did I do something wrong? Did Dad?”
“No, pretty girl,” I tell her, pressing my palm against the side of her cheek. “You did everything perfect. I was scared that I wouldn’t love you the right way. That I would let you down. Hurt you. I know I’m not your mom, but I want to be in your life. I want to love you and be your friend.”