Total pages in book: 101
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
“Of course!” Victoria grins. “You know Celeste is like a daughter to me.” She gives me a hug. “We’ll see you tomorrow.”
“You haven’t been home in a few days,” my mom says as we make our way to the front door. Nick and his dad have stopped talking, and Nick is now giving me a curious look as he stands and walks over to say goodbye. Every day we’ve hung out, he’s dropped me off at my house. “Will you be coming home tonight?” My mom never asks about when I’ll be home. I think her knowing that I’m leaving in a few days has her suddenly wanting to spend time with me before I leave. It wasn’t said, but I think we both know once I leave this town, the chances of my coming back are slim.
“Yes,” I tell her, ignoring Nick’s glare. “I’ll ride with you.”
The ten-minute drive home is quiet. When we pull up to the trailer, a couple bikers pass by, and my mom’s head turns. She does it anytime a bike passes by. She’s checking to make sure it’s not my dad. She’s been doing it my entire life.
“You were only with my dad for a couple months, right?”
She looks at me stunned. I never ask about him. “Yes, two and a half months.” She smiles sadly. “But I knew I loved him the minute I met him.”
“How did you know?”
“It was the way he smiled at me. Like, without even knowing me, I was already his entire world.” A single tear rolls down her cheek. “I know it seems crazy, Celeste.” More tears fall. “I tried to move on a few times…when you were younger. I just couldn’t.” She shakes her head. “My heart just can’t let go of him.”
“But what if he’s moved on?”
“I don’t believe it. He loved me with his entire heart. I don’t know why he never came back, but I refuse to believe it’s because he found someone else.”
“I think…I’ve fallen in love,” I admit out loud to my mom.
“Oh, sweetie,” my mom coos. “What’s his name? Can I meet him?”
“His name is Jase, and I don’t know. I’m leaving in a few days to New York. It’s like the worst timing ever. And on top of that, I lied to him…well, kind of lied. He thinks I’m in college and older than what I am.” I leave out that he also has no clue that I live in a rundown trailer park on the other side of the tracks. “And he has no clue I’m leaving soon. I doubt he’ll even forgive me for not being honest.”
My mom takes my hand in hers, and my throat clogs with emotion. Over the years, I’ve dreamt of having boy talks with my mom, and of course, when we finally do, it’s over a boy I’m going to have to walk away from, while also walking away from my mom.
“You need to talk to him, Celeste. Find him and tell him everything. If he loves you, he’ll forgive you. He’ll put all that shit aside and focus on what matters. If it’s true love, you will find a way to be together. Every day I wish I would’ve spoken to Snake before he left. I wish I would’ve gotten more information, so I could look for him. Don’t live with regrets.”
“I hate that you’re so heartbroken, Mom,” I admit. “I want more for you. For you to fall in love, again, or for you to move on. Come to New York with me,” I plead.
My mom gives me a soft smile. “I can’t do that, pretty girl. New York is your dream. I need to stay right here. I have to believe one day Snake will return.”
“It’s been eighteen years,” I point out.
“I know.” She sighs. “I know I’m stupid to think that maybe one day he’ll return, but I just can’t stop hoping. Your heart can’t help who it loves. I love Snake, and I can’t just stop. Now, go find that boy and talk to him. You can take my car. Follow your heart, pretty girl.”
“Okay, thank you.” I lean over and give my mom a hug. I hate that she’s been stuck in the same place for the last two decades. I hate that love did this to her. It’s the reason I never wanted to fall in love, yet somehow it found me anyway. She’s right. I need to talk to Jase. I need to follow my heart. I can’t end up like my mom—always wondering what if.
I pull up to Jase’s apartment complex and park my mom’s car. I run up the stairs and knock on the door. When nobody answers, I check the time on my phone. It’s already after ten o’clock. Maybe they’re sleeping. Remembering there’s a key under the mat Jase told me I could use, I pluck it out and unlock the door. The apartment is quiet, and I wonder if maybe I should’ve called first.