Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 84266 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84266 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
“Mother.” Ben wished he’d taken up the habit of calling her by her first name because the word tasted like battery acid on his tongue.
“You’re looking well. No more sling?”
“I’m surviving.” Ben sure as shit wasn’t discussing his injuries with her and he cut right to the only detail he cared about. “You here to make trouble?”
She bristled, pulling herself to her full height, which almost equaled his. “I’m here because I was invited. And my guru preaches spreading love and acceptance—”
“I don’t care about your guru.” Ben wasn’t kidding. Marilee might have visited their mother out at the commune a few times, but he’d never bothered. “All I care is that you don’t ruin this for them.”
“I wouldn’t.” His mother’s eyes went wide, but Ben wasn’t buying the innocent act. He’d long ago stopped believing her.
“Everything okay?” Leaning heavily on his new cane, Maddox made his way over to them. A knot in Ben’s back unkinked. He couldn’t remember ever being happier to see his guy. Maddox would make this better. He had to.
“This is my mother.” Calling her that felt generous, especially today. It was Camilla who had sat with him in ICU, Camilla who had brought him food and booze when Trey left, and Camilla who had always found a way to check on him, no matter where he was deployed.
“Oh.” There was a world of meaning in that syllable from Maddox, over ten years of hearing Ben rant about his mother, and God love him, he moved to stand closer to Ben, big body a protective bulwark against the wind from the ocean and the waves of discomfort between him and his mother. “I’m Maddox.”
“My boyfriend,” Ben added because fuck it. They were adults and he was done with today, done with pretending like Maddox was just another wedding guest and not the center of his whole damn universe. And yeah, part of it was to see her green eyes go wide. He figured someone had clued his mother in to him being gay, probably Marilee, but Ben didn’t really care if he shocked her all the way back to her damn guru and that lousy excuse for a commune. Wasn’t she supposed to eschew worldly things like nice dresses and champagne receptions and weddings?
“Ah. It’s nice to meet you.” His mother extended a hand, and there was a long scar on the back of one hand. She hadn’t had that back when she’d been pretending to enjoy running with the country club set.
“Gardening mishap.” His mother noticed his look. “I brought some of our onion jam and a few pints of apple chutney as wedding presents.”
Ben’s jaw tightened so fast it was a wonder there wasn’t an audible creak.
“That’s lovely,” Maddox enthused, because Maddox. Well, that and cooking. “Maybe I can charm the recipe for the onion jam out of you later?”
“I’d like that.” Her face softened, but Ben didn’t relax any.
Maddox shifted his weight onto his cane and grabbed Ben’s hand with his free hand, squeezing him tight. That small contact was everything Ben needed right then. The look Maddox gave him was one he’d seen a number of times over the years: I’ve got your back. Ben took a deep breath. He might be a colossal dumbass but at least he had this. For now.
“Oh there’s Marilee!” His mother sounded more than a little relieved to have an excuse to move away, waving at Marilee, who was preparing Ben’s nephew for ring bearer duty. Wandering over in their direction, his mother left him and Maddox.
“What was up with that?” Maddox asked in a low voice.
Ben sighed. It was so classic Maddox to support him when he needed it most but to also call him on his behavior. “I’m sorry. I know we said—”
“Can we get everyone to their places please?” The wedding planner breezed by, totally killing Ben’s apology and argument in favor of dropping pretenses.
“Don’t worry about it.” Maddox squeezed his hand again before dropping it. “We can talk later. Go out there and make your dad proud.”
He’s not the one I care about making proud. Ben’s throat was thick, and his tongue refused to work. All he could do was nod and hurry back to the end of the aisle where Marilee and the others were waiting. Thankfully, his mother had left to take a seat.
“Was that you and Maddox holding hands?” Marilee hissed as she finished smoothing down her son’s fluffy toddler curls.
“Drop it,” Ben warned, not in the mood for sisterly interference. “It’s not the time.”
But as she took his arm, he had to wonder when it would be the time, when this wouldn’t be a huge deal but simply the new normal. He wanted that more than he’d ever thought possible. He glanced over at Maddox, needing one last reassuring look that things weren’t fucked up beyond fixing, but Maddox was deep in conversation with Ben’s mother, who was sitting next to him.