Total pages in book: 184
Estimated words: 186756 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 934(@200wpm)___ 747(@250wpm)___ 623(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 186756 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 934(@200wpm)___ 747(@250wpm)___ 623(@300wpm)
I don’t know why I can’t answer him just yet.
I just can’t.
Maybe because my heart’s so full. My body’s so full.
Of feelings. Of emotions.
He’s still the only man I’ve told about my dream—other than my biji—who didn’t laugh at me. Who didn’t make a joke about it, dismiss it.
He was interested.
He was curious.
And God, he still is.
“Dora,” he prods when all I do is stare at him.
And now there’s no way I can answer him because… Dora.
He called me Dora.
“No one calls me that”—I swallow—“still.”
A muscle jumps on his cheek. “She still give you a hard time about it?”
I nod, my heart racing in my chest. “Yeah. She doesn’t want me to be an actress.”
“And are you?”
“I’m what?”
“An actress”—his gaze flicking back and forth between mine—“yet? Because last time you were on your way to an audition to be one.”
I don’t know why I blush at this.
But I do.
Maybe it’s his direct gaze. Or maybe because I’d sounded so hopeful back then.
So young.
Even though it was only a year ago.
“I never made it,” I tell him.
I guess he already knows, though; I spent the night dancing with his twin brother in my quest to make him jealous.
“What happened to that guy who was waiting for you?” he asks next, his voice raspy now.
And I can’t believe it.
Even though I know he remembers everything from that night; he’s already proven that. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that he remembers the guy I’d mentioned to him in passing.
“He said I wasn’t worth it,” I share on a whisper.
“What?” he bites out.
When I didn’t show up to meet him at his car, he called me nonstop. Something I noticed the next day. He left me numerous texts and voicemails, ranging from being concerned and cajoling to angry and ranting.
“He said that”—I remember the exact words from his last voicemail—“I couldn’t be that good of a lay to make him wait for over an hour, and that I didn’t have any talent to begin with anyway. So I kinda did him a favor by not showing up.”
I’m used to men being angry at me.
It’s the name of the game when you tempt them and refuse to put out. I don’t mind it. But apparently, this man in front of me does. There’s no question about it.
He is angry.
“What’s his name?” he asks, his voice raspy sounding once again but in a way that’s dark and threatening, and his jaw is tensed.
My heart’s spinning in my chest. “Why?”
“He live in New York?”
“Bardstown.”
“Then he’ll be easy to find.”
My eyes go wide. “Are you going to?”
Another clench of his jaw. “Yes.”
“Why, so you can beat him up?”
“So I can teach him how to talk to a girl, yes.”
“And how do you talk to a girl?”
“Nicely.”
“Is that another one of your rules?”
“Yeah.”
“You never talk nicely to me, though.”
“What can I say,” he murmurs, “you’re fire and I’m ice. You’re the only girl I melt for.”
I close my eyes then.
Because it’s music to my ears.
It’s poetry.
It’s a song for the ages.
But it’s also a lie.
He doesn’t melt for me.
I want him to, but he doesn’t. And his mocking words are the proof. Opening my eyes, I find that his are roving over my face. His are drinking my features in like he drinks that smoke.
Hungrily, compulsively.
Or so I think.
“You don’t,” I whisper, shaking my head. “So you don’t get to ask questions like this. You don’t get to ask about my dreams or my mom or that guy. If anyone is going to beat him up, it’s him. Your twin brother. My boyfriend. And you’re not him, are you?”
It’s none of his business what my mother was saying to me. What my mother did. What she’s always done—pinch me, dig her nails into my skin when no one’s looking, smack me away from everyone’s eyes. Something that’s increased in the past year ever since I started hanging out with Shepard. Because she thinks I’ll do something to screw it up. In my usual slutty fashion, I’ll do something to cause a scandal and ruin the team. They already had to transfer or fire or trade in players and staff members in the last two years because of me, and now that team’s finally on its winning streak and making money for my father, I’ll mess things up.
So a few months ago, she banished me to Bardstown.
Where I could be away from New York and the team.
I think she always wanted to do it mostly because she wanted me away so she didn’t have to deal with me and my scandalous ways, and also keep me closeted in a small town where I may not be able to pursue my dream. So when I started hanging out with Shep, she saw it as an opportunity and finally sent me away.