Total pages in book: 20
Estimated words: 18571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 93(@200wpm)___ 74(@250wpm)___ 62(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 18571 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 93(@200wpm)___ 74(@250wpm)___ 62(@300wpm)
Oliver’s hands slid out from under his and he crossed his arms defensively. But he didn’t leave.
“So what are you saying now? That I’m the right person? After half a cup of sugary coffee and some eye fucking, you just decide you like men? Simple as that?”
Add in a week of sleepless nights and constant fantasies starring the man across from him, and that was exactly what he was saying.
“I’m saying that I’m not confused about what I want to do with, and to, you. I’m saying I’m far from perfect, but I’m comfortable enough with who I am to be adaptable about what I am. I’m saying I don’t have any problem with the idea of sucking you off. The thought is so appealing, I’m embarrassed to say I’m not sure I could stand up to follow you out at the moment without limping. But I’ll do it, if that’s what it takes for you to take me seriously.”
Oliver studied the table as if he could see the cockstand Matthew was currently hiding beneath it.
“I’m saying,” he continued softly. “That I’m attracted to you, too, in case you’re still unsure. I already know I want to go out with you again. For coffee, dinner, or whatever you feel comfortable with. I want to know you. And frankly, that’s just as new for me as wanting a man.”
“Getting to know people is new to you?” Oliver scoffed.
“No. But dating is.” At the disbelief in his expression, Matthew nodded, resigned. “It’s true. And yes, I’ll fully admit to being a git in the past if it means you’ll believe the rest of what I’m saying now.”
“Go on.”
Matthew swallowed nervously. This was not how he’d expected this conversation to go. “Okay then. I’ve had sex with people. Women. Done scenes at the kink club or spent a few hours in a hotel with them before we went our separate ways. But I’ve never actually dated anyone. Called, picked them up, sent them flowers, that sort of thing. God, I sound like a worthless gobshite, don’t I?”
“I don’t know what that is, but it has a ring to it.” Oliver’s eyes were wider than usual. “Just to clarify, you’re trying to get me, a gay man, to date you by telling me all about your slutty sex with strange women you don’t even like?”
“Fuck,” he swore, wishing for whiskey or a time machine. “I told you I’m new at this.”
“New and pathetically bad,” Oliver agreed easily, sounding dazed. “But honest. Who would lie about something like that? It makes you sound like a gobshite.”
Matthew snorted, and a second later they were both laughing out loud, though for him it was more from a sense of relief and gratitude.
He’s still here.
“For future reference, never share that story again when you’re asking someone out. Sexual histories come later, once you’ve hooked them with your irresistible personality and charm.”
“I’ve heard that advice before.”
I should have listened to Rory.
Oliver gazed at him and shook his head. “I’m still having a hard time believing you’ve never had a relationship. What about high school? I can’t imagine a teenage girl who wouldn’t be chasing you down the hall for a date to the dance.”
“I never went to a dance.” Matthew saw his expression and laughed. “You look like I’ve admitted to murdering a puppy.”
“You never went to a dance?” Oliver repeated. “How is that possible?”
“My life was different in Ireland. We didn’t exactly hang out with a good crowd. The kind that went to dances and had dates at the malt shop.”
“I don’t think anyone’s been on a malt shop date since the fifties, but continue,” Oliver said with a cheeky grin.
“That’s really the gist of it. Everyone in town knew who and what we were and treated us accordingly. I’m afraid my siblings and I are from the crooked branch of the family tree.”
“That’s hard to believe.” Oliver brushed off his words easily. “The last time I saw your brother, he was on the phone with his wife, reading her a book on child rearing. Out loud, and in front of other men. You can’t get more wholesome than that. And you don’t strike me as a criminal mastermind either.”
“I appreciate the vote of confidence, and I agree I’ve never been on the run from the law, but my cousins are the true paragons. Firefighters, police officers, a senator… Local heroes every one of them.”
“And your family?”
His father had had a gambling addiction that had led to his death, and that of Matthew’s mother, leaving their three children with a loony old man who wasn’t physically capable of putting food on the table. William was forced to get a job as muscle for the local criminal element, and Matthew and Kate were expected to pretend that everything was normal when everyone knew it wasn’t—and to resist the temptation of joining the family business.