Total pages in book: 154
Estimated words: 142664 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 713(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 142664 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 713(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
“Are you asking me how I feel about you, little Alyssa? Words are easy, I’d rather show you. But I will give you this. The moment I saw you walking towards me in that meeting, my dick got hard, and my heart almost flew out of my chest. I’ve been attracted physically before, but not once have I ever felt my heart respond that way to anyone before. And just so you know, had your ex not screwed up, I would’ve found a way to take you away from him. Because there’s no way that you don’t belong to me.”
ALYSSA
He’s very smooth and seems to know all the right things to say, even if they’re things I didn’t know I needed or wanted to hear. I’m not a romantic, never have been, I have no use for it. But I have to admit that his words have an odd effect on my senses. If only I could believe them without the fear that if I did, he’d someday have the power to break my heart.
“Don’t think so hard. All you need to do is not hold me responsible for the things done by others. Judge me only according to my own deeds. Can you do that?” I could only nod against his chest, and the way he wrapped his arms tighter around me, I was sure he knew how terrified I was.
It was becoming so real, too real, and I was having a hard time keeping my feelings separated when he said things like that. We hadn’t even exchanged vows yet, and he was already sucking me in. I wanted to run away, but there was a whole ocean between me and land. I think he may have done this on purpose.
“Breathe, little Alyssa. How about this: every year on our anniversary, you can decide if you want to stay or go, that way you’re only on a yearly contract. If, say, at year five, you’ve decided you want out, you may leave. Even year two or three. I’ll have the papers drawn up for us to sign, but and here's the kicker: you have to tell me if there’s something wrong, something you need that I’m not providing, and give me the chance to fix it before you just up and leave.”
That somehow eased my panic. Yes, that sounds better, a year-to-year thing instead of a lifetime. I don’t know why that made me feel less stressed. “Well? How does that sound?” I was too choked up to answer, so I wrapped my arms around him and let that be enough.
I didn’t realize until he sighed and exhaled that he, too, had been holding his breath. Why the heck was he….? Oh! He’s just as nervous as I am. Can it be? There’s no way. But when I moved my ear over his chest to where I could hear his heartbeat, I heard it. That same wild, out-of-control pounding that somehow soothed me.
“Are you okay now? We’re being very poor hosts; we should get back to the others before they start to worry.” I could’ve stayed in his arms for a few moments more, but whatever. “On second thought, let’s stay here like this until you’re ready to let go.”
I can get used to this, having someone cater to me without having to be told, but I dare not let it go on for too long, or it’ll be hell when our inevitable first fight happens. I’m not dumb enough to think our life together is always going to be this easy or that the day won’t come when he gets sick of me, but he keeps knocking me off kilter with her easygoing attitude and willingness to let me have my way.
“I don’t think you should pretend to be so willing to always give me what I want. I might get used to it and expect it all the time.”
“There’s a few things I can say to that. One, I’m older than you are; two, I don’t have the same trauma that you do; three, I’m head over heels in love with you, so therefore, I’ll be the one doing the heavy lifting for now.”
“Once you are no longer burdened by the scars in your heart and realize that there’s no need to fear me, I’ll expect you to pull your weight in the love department.”
“You’re so sure that I can love?”
“Positive, and when you do, sweet Alyssa, it’s going to be spectacular. And I want to be the one who’s there for it.” He did that kiss on the top of my head thing again, and I smiled. I think that was the first genuine smile I’ve shared with someone other than my brothers or Mom. It felt good.
GARRETT
She’s terrified of life and doesn’t even know it. I could kick her father’s ass, but she’s already done that, and besides, that’s no way to start our relationship off. She’s not the first victim of childhood divorce that I’ve met, obviously, but she’s the first whose scars were so easy to see, at least for me.