Total pages in book: 141
Estimated words: 142783 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 714(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 142783 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 714(@200wpm)___ 571(@250wpm)___ 476(@300wpm)
I tried to hold back the rush of affection I felt just witnessing the scene.
An outsider who wouldn’t last dipping her toes into the impossible.
This was so incredibly foolish.
So perfect and so uncomfortable.
So right and so wrong.
I had to wonder if it was just another way Logan had in mind to punish me. If he wanted to toss in my face what I’d missed.
Didn’t he get it?
I already understood I’d missed out on everything.
The loss was profound.
Deep and dark and perpetual.
One class would go out only for another to enter, the performance a mesh of ballet, carols, and small acts.
Each time, Logan seemed to draw me closer. As if in the whimsical fantasy, in the enchanted darkness, he’d forgotten that we were supposed to be enemies. As if he’d slipped back to the time when loving him was a sin but the only thing I’d ever done right.
The show was endearing. Filled with simple joy and Christmas spirit. I did my best not to get swept in the simple triumph of it. In the sweet innocence.
Impossible.
It was bottled in my chest like a shaken concoction. A chemical reaction.
Logan and family and regret.
Hope and warmth and joy.
It grew thicker and thicker with each minute that passed.
It was funny that I’d all but forgotten that Christmas was less than a month away, that it hadn’t mattered, not any of it, not until right then.
“Sweet, isn’t it?” he murmured, though it was tinged in sadness, and his hand slipped free of my shoulder only to thread with my fingers on my lap. He squeezed so hard I had to wonder if he needed to make sure I was real. “That right there, Aster. That’s what I was talking about. That’s what matters.”
He glanced at me.
I got stuck there.
In the man who right then looked so familiar.
My heart panged, and by the time the children piled out onto the stage with their teachers, Eden and her father in the middle, all of them taking a bow, tears clouded my eyes.
The crowd was on their feet for a standing ovation.
I was on mine, too.
Luckily it was expected because there was no chance I could remain sitting. I doubted I could remain standing there, either, not when the overhead lights flipped on, and I suddenly felt as if it were me who was standing in a spotlight.
Once the applause wore off, Trent and Jud both looked between me and Logan.
What did Logan expect me to do now?
Play along that we were old friends?
That we’d kept in touch?
What did they even know about us?
Discomfort shifted my feet as I stood under the force of Trent’s glare and the uneasiness of Jud’s watch.
Logan wrapped his arm around my waist and cinched me close, his smile all easy cockiness and no shits to give, as if the man had stepped into a different persona in front of his brothers.
But I felt the undercurrent of severity in his hold.
“All I’ve got to say is my niece and nephew are superstars. I mean, we know they get it from me, but still, superstars. Both of them are going to grow up to be just like their uncle Logan. Awesome knows awesome.” Logan grinned wide as his ridiculous claim flooded out.
Trent gently bounced the infant against his chest, kissing the top of her head as he sent a grunt at his youngest brother. “In my worst nightmare,” he grumbled.
Logan cracked up, pulling me tighter like I was his lover and not his enemy. “Hey now, that’s just rude. Why you gotta be so mean? I’ve obviously rubbed off on your kid. Did you see him up there? You know he didn’t get that shit from you.”
He pressed a kiss to my temple right after he said it.
My knees knocked. Clammy discomfort clashed with the warmth.
What the hell did he think he was doing?
Trent’s gaze followed Logan’s attentions, his eyes narrowing in speculation. “Aster Costa. Have to say, I’m surprised to see you.”
We weren’t friends.
We weren’t even acquaintances, really. I’d known him from a distance and his reputation and the love Logan had for him.
That was true for all Logan’s brothers.
Both the two still living and standing in front of me and the one they’d lost.
Logan laughed again and shook me around. “Seriously, can you believe it? I ran into Aster here last night, and I thought she should stick around so we could catch up. What luck, right?”
He sent me an overzealous smile.
“Hmm,” was all Trent managed as he lifted the baby higher and pressed his mouth to her head.
Jud cast a cautious glance at Trent before he rounded him and came my way. Nerves shook the ground below before a surprised squeak left me when he suddenly curled me in his massive arms.
At first, I wanted to fight him, but it took only a flash to recognize his embrace was kind, though somehow filled with reservation. “It’s good to officially meet you, Aster.”