Total pages in book: 144
Estimated words: 134830 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 674(@200wpm)___ 539(@250wpm)___ 449(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 134830 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 674(@200wpm)___ 539(@250wpm)___ 449(@300wpm)
I’m guessing that’s why there are three extra vehicles already parked in the driveway, forcing me to line up at the curb out front. At least here, that’s not a problem. The women inside? Huge problems.
By the cars, I know Janey’s home, as she should be since she’s had Peanut Butter all day, plus my sister, Kayla, and other sisters-in-law, Samantha and Luna, are here. And that’s what has me cursing. Four against one. I’m dead before I even put it in park.
My only hope for survival? I pick up the soda I grabbed from a drive-thru on my way here as an apology-slash-appreciation for Janey. But I’ve got nothing for the other women. It won’t matter to them that I didn’t know they’d be here. They’ll think I should’ve divined that information from the fucking atmosphere or some shit and brought goodies for them too.
Oh, actually… on second thought… I reach into my console and come out with a box of mini Slim Jims for snack emergencies. There’s four left. Perfect. I slip them in my back pocket, planning to save them for the right moment, a.k.a. when they give me shit, as they have a habit of doing.
I step up on the porch and a disembodied voice comes from the doorbell. It’s not a Ring. Nothing that mass-marketed would do for Cole, but it’s the Pentagon-level version of the same thing. “Where the hell have you been?” the voice says.
“Good to see you too, Cole.” I get right up close to the camera, peering into it with one eye from mere inches away. I hope Cole can see the zero fucks I’m giving on his end of the video feed. When I move back, I’m grinning like I’ve amused myself and go as far as giving the doorbell a little tap. “You in there?”
“You’re late,” Cole informs me, as if I don’t know what time it is. I might not write it in surveillance reports like he does, ‘person of interest has stripper on his lap 23:14’, but I know I stayed at Dani’s later than I intended to. I’m not the least bit sorry for it, especially given how things ended, but I know it’s well after my usual six-ish o’clock pickup time.
“Aww, did wu miss me? I miss wu too, big bro.” If he can be brusque and get a pass, I can be sarcastic and expect the same. Or at least that’s my theory. I pat my chest, right over my heart, and screw my face up like tears are imminent in less than three seconds. “Come home soon so I can hug your neck, m’kay?”
“God, you’re annoying as fuck. I can’t deal with you today.” I hear his sigh, can virtually feel his annoyance in the sound.
I lean back down to the camera and ask more seriously, “How much longer are you gone?”
“Three days. It’s my last assignment, and I almost bailed on it because I couldn’t bear to leave her, but she forced me to go.”
I bite the insides of my cheeks… hard. Janey is my sweetest sister-in-law, and she basically wakes up smiling about the new day, lives under an awning of happy rainbows, and goes to bed feeling at peace. She’s like golden glitter confetti in person form. So the idea of her forcing my brother to do anything is hilarious. Fucking. Hilarious.
“I’ll make sure Janey’s okay.”
Cole doesn’t get a chance to answer back because the door opens as I’m reassuring him. “Well, you’ve already fucked up that job, haven’t you?”
Yep, that’d be my sister, Kayla. Blonde, blue-eyed, ball-busting, bitch—which is a label she wears with pride, claiming if a man resorts to calling her that, it’s because she’s already proven her balls are bigger than his and he’s pouting about his own inadequacy. To be clear, she’s definitely got bigger cojones than me and I’m under no disillusionment about that.
“Good to see you too, Sis,” I tell her, pushing my way inside.
In the living room, I find Janey, Samantha, and Luna sitting on various pieces of furniture. It looks like Kayla just vacated a chair because there’s a blanket swirled up on the seat like she’s been nesting there.
Samantha is married to my brother, Chance. She’s the perfect shot of moonshine whiskey, with a filterless mouth that she can back up with major brains, just the right contrast to my brother’s green tea-vegetable smoothie. Chance is the equivalent of white bread toast as far as the rest of us are concerned, with a good guy reputation and image that he’s actually earned and definitely deserves.
Luna and Samantha are besties, which must be an ‘opposites attract’ deal because Luna is a quiet, bookish art nerd who tends to be nervous about any direct attention unless it comes from her husband, Carter, who’s also my brother. Even now, behind the lenses of her oversized glasses, she’s not looking at me, but rather just over my head. I think she’s secretly amused by my antics, though, as I’ve caught her biting her lip to keep from laughing at some of the more outrageous ones, like when I had a whipped cream speed-eating contest with my niece, Grace, and ended up blowing white snot out of my nose… at Mom and Dad’s dinner table, onto a linen napkin.