Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 100225 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 501(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100225 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 501(@200wpm)___ 401(@250wpm)___ 334(@300wpm)
“He’s okay,” a nurse announces. “His leads just came off.”
She sounds like she knows what she’s talking about. Once I hear T’s heartbeat on the monitor, I move back. I turn quickly to find the elevator. I need to get away from this antiseptic smell and cloud of doom. It seems like my sanity is slipping away, I feel like I’m starting to crack. Releasing Thea's hand, I quickly locate the elevator and repeatedly hit the down button. It feels like forever before the doors open and I all but charge inside. Thea is right on my heels, which surprises me. I don’t say anything, though. I’m not sure I can. As soon as the doors slide shut, Thea is holding me close, her arms around me, her head buried in my chest.
“He’s going to be okay, Dom.”
“Yeah,” I exhale, tilting my head down and burying my face into her hair.
“He is. T is a fighter, Dom. He’s fought through much more than both of us. He has a new baby on the way and a woman he loves. He’ll get through this.”
“Yeah,” I repeat because that seems to be the only thing I know how to say.
She pulls back to look up at me, her hand going to each side of my face. “It’s going to be okay.”
She just keeps saying the same thing, I know. Still, every time she says it, I begin to believe. I cup her hands with mine and stare into her beautiful eyes. “Thank you for being here, Thea.”
“I love him, too, Dom. We’re family,” she responds, and her response is bittersweet. We are family, but the feeling and thoughts I’ve had about Thea are anything but familial. This is just proof I need to get those thoughts out of my head. She’s too good for the likes of me, anyhow. I hurt her when we were younger. To make matters worse, I did it over a woman who spent most of our relationship lying to me. Hell, deep down I even knew she was lying, and I still let her.
“Yeah, we are,” I agree and kiss her forehead just as the door opens. “I need some air,” I respond with a sigh.
“I’ll go with you,” she offers, but I shake my head. “Go be with your parents. I’ll be back in a bit.”
“Are you sure?” For a minute I think I see pain cross over her face, but it’s gone in a flash. I’m probably just being stupid. Thea wants to be my friend—or maybe even look at me as another brother. That’s more than I deserve, and I can’t fuck this up.
“Yeah, you watch over T for me while I catch my breath.”
“Okay, if you’re positive.”
“I am.”
“Okay, Dom. I’ll see you back upstairs.”
Putting in my best effort, I give her a sincere smile and walk away. I’m feeling hopeless and a lot older than I am. I don’t know how to fix it. I just know I need T to survive this. T is everything good. If The Man Upstairs would, I’d beg Him to let me change places with T. I have always felt so fucking guilty. Things came easily to me, but not T. He’s struggled his whole life. It’s not fair, and I’ve never wanted to fix things more for him than I do right now … Maybe someday I will be able to do that, but right now, I just need my brother to survive this.
Please God, let him survive.
Chapter 4
Thea
I miss you. Come home.
I stare at Deke’s text and shake my head.
I’ve been home a month now, and I still have no idea what I’m doing. I know I’m not ready to go back to New York. I also have no desire to speak to Deke right now. When I told Dom that Deke was the first man I've truly cared for since my crush on him, I wasn't lying. It’s the truth. What I didn’t tell Dom is that Deke has changed since joining med school. He’s stressed all the time. He’s short tempered with me and everything I do seems to be the wrong thing. Two days before I came home, he slapped me because I got mad at him for screaming at me because I forgot to start the dishwasher the night before.
I mean, I know it’s nasty—that’s a given. Still, I had been on my leg all day, packing up my apartment. I was in so much pain, I had to take the prescription medicine that the doctor gave me. I could barely keep my eyes open, so I went to bed. I thought I had pushed start, but I obviously didn’t.
Until that point, Deke had never gotten physical with me. Verbally belittling when he was upset did happen, but he never hit me. I haven’t spoken to him since and I’m not sure I want to again. I asked him not to contact me until I had time to think things through. It doesn’t surprise me that he is ignoring what I want. Now that I think back on our relationship, he always ignored what I wanted when it didn’t align with his own wants and needs.