Total pages in book: 130
Estimated words: 131728 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 659(@200wpm)___ 527(@250wpm)___ 439(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131728 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 659(@200wpm)___ 527(@250wpm)___ 439(@300wpm)
Oh no . . . he doesn’t want this. Scared of the answer, I ask the question. “And where was that?”
“Married . . . to you.”
I frown. Not the answer I was expecting. “And that . . . ?”
“Fucked with my head.”
I nod as I begin to understand. “You’re processing.”
“Processing what . . . that I’m a complete fucking asshole?”
I smile softly as I lie down beside him. “That things are changing.”
We lie in silence for a while.
“I don’t know how to turn my head off.” He sighs.
“So don’t.”
He frowns.
“Henley, just because you have feelings for me doesn’t mean that you are out of control.”
“It sure feels like it.”
I roll onto my side so I can see his face. “What does it feel like?”
He thinks for a moment as he tries to articulate this. “Like the floodgates have finally opened, and as a consequence, I’m about to drown.”
“Because you’ve been holding yourself back from everyone for so long?”
He nods.
I stay silent as I try to think of the right thing to say here.
“I’m an all-or-nothing kind of person, Jules. As far as relationships go, I’ve always been nothing.”
I listen.
“It’s just . . .” He lets out a deflated sigh. “I’m moving too fast. This isn’t . . .” He cuts himself off. “I shouldn’t be . . .”
“You’re afraid that your all . . . is too much?”
His eyes search mine, and I know that’s it. That’s the answer I’ve been looking for.
“Your all is not too much for me, Henley. It’s what I want too.” I pause. Should I say this out loud?
Fuck it.
Lay it all on the table.
“I know that you’re the one for me. I’ve known it for a while now. I want marriage, I want to see you in my children, and most of all, I want what I deserve, what we both deserve—the happily ever after.”
He frowns. “But we hardly know each other. It’s not normal to feel like this so quickly.”
“Says who?” I kiss him softly. “Since when do you want to be normal?”
His arm tenderly slides up my back as he stares at me.
“For the record, you cannot move too fast for me. I am all in, all yours. I’m here, Hen. Ready and waiting.”
He takes my face in his hands and kisses me, his tongue slowly sliding through my lips. “I truly love you,” he whispers. “I’m trying to be better; I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I am.”
The emotion behind his words brings tears to my eyes. “I know, baby.” I kiss him softly and want to lighten the mood. “So what time are we getting married tomorrow?”
He breaks into a breathtaking smile. “Don’t even joke. I’m feeling unhinged enough to actually want to do it.”
We fall serious as we stare at each other, the air swirling between us.
So ask me, then.
“Promise me something,” I whisper.
“Anything.” He kisses me softly.
“If you have a moment where you freak out . . . you just say, Juliet, I’m having a moment.”
His eyes hold mine.
“That way, I’ll know where your head is at, because when you pull away from me in the middle of things . . . it’s upsetting.”
He thinks for a moment and eventually nods. “Okay.” He rolls onto his side, facing me, his fingers sliding through my sex.
His touch is different now. My Henley is back, his tenderness returned. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” he whispers as if pained. “I didn’t mean to . . . Did I hurt you?”
“Shh,” I soothe him. I kiss him softly. “It’s okay, baby. No, you didn’t. I’ve got you.”
He rolls over me, and his body slides deep into mine. “Let me make it up to you,” he murmurs against my lips. “I’m sorry.” He slowly pumps me.
And right here on the floor, in the middle of the night, Henley James makes sweet slow love to me for the first time.
“I love you too.”
I was scared before . . . but now, I’m terrified.
This has to work out because I can’t lose him.
Ever.
The night markets are abuzz with activity, and Henley and I amble along, soaking in the atmosphere. It’s been a great day, the best.
We walk into a shell stall and look around; Henley picks up a huge white shell and smiles as he looks down at it. “My mom used to love these shells.”
“Did she?”
That’s the first time he has ever mentioned what she was like.
“Yeah.” He puts it back on the shelf.
“Can we get it?” I ask.
“Why would you want that?”
“Because your mom would love to have a shell at my place,” I say casually as I keep looking around.
He scrunches his nose.
“I’m going to get it.” I take it to the counter and pay the lady as he waits outside the store. Eventually I join him. “I got it.” I smile.