Total pages in book: 111
Estimated words: 102136 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 511(@200wpm)___ 409(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 102136 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 511(@200wpm)___ 409(@250wpm)___ 340(@300wpm)
“No,” Maddie said, squeezing her eyes shut.
“I thought I’d killed you, like Mama,” I confessed and remembered Mama on the bed, knife at her side. There was blood everywhere. “Like I killed… like I killed… Isaiah.” Maddie was shaking her head. “I hurt everyone. I don’t mean to, but I always do.”
“Flame, no. You don’t.” But I knew I did. I felt the flames. Maddie didn’t know how they felt. I heard the demons inside of me, telling me I was evil. Poppa had been right. Pastor Hughes had been right. I didn’t think the same as everyone else. I wasn’t like everyone else. I was darkness. I was picked by the devil to hurt people.
“I… I love you, Maddie.”
“Flame. I love you too. So much.” Maddie cried. “Look at me.” I did. “You will not, have not and could not hurt me.” She was wrong. Maddie was so good. She didn’t see the evil inside me, like my poppa had. He saw it, the snakes proved it.
“I’m so tired,” I rasped. I moved to the chair beside the bed and lay my head back on the mattress. Once again, I moved my hand closer to Maddie’s. I felt better being near.
“Sleep, baby,” Maddie said. Her voice was like the lullabies my mama used to sing.
My eyes began to close. “Don’t touch me. Don’t touch the flames.”
“I promise,” Maddie said. I heard her gasp. When I opened my eyes to see why, she was staring at my arm. “Flame,” she whispered. “Your arm...” I felt the blade in my pocket Maddie hated knives so much. She didn’t like me cutting myself. It made her sad.
My Maddie was perfect. I’d never deserved her. I was slow, a fucking retard. I didn’t understand the world. I was a sinner and I had evil in my blood. My poppa saw it. Ash saw it too. But Maddie always saw something else in me. Something she loved. I never knew what that was. I wished I saw it too. “Sleep, my love,” Maddie hushed. My chest stopped aching so much when she smiled at me. I liked her smile. It made the flames go away for a while. Not forever, but enough to help me breathe. “Sleep. I am here with you.” I closed my eyes and felt Maddie’s warm breath on my cheek. But when I slept, all I saw was Maddie dead, in the flames… and I was holding her hand. My touch had killed her.
My eyes snapped open.
I never wanted to sleep again.
*****
I heard the door open behind me. It was dark. It had been two days since Maddie had woken up. The doctors were letting her go home tomorrow. Grabbing my knife, I turned around. Smiler stood in the doorway. He waved me outside to the hallway. I checked on Maddie. She was asleep.
I got up from my chair and went outside. My skin felt itchy. I couldn’t keep still. I couldn’t ever fucking sleep. I didn’t know how much longer I could hold the flames back. The demons wanted control. I hoped I could keep the flames back long enough so that Maddie could get home and safe.
“We got a lead,” Smiler said. My body froze. I felt the anger in my gut starting to rise. “Tracked them, four hours away.” Smiler’s eyes were too intense. I dropped my gazed to the floor.
“The ones who hurt Maddie?” I asked.
“About three of them. Don’t know who the fuck they are. But it’s them alright.” My blood ran faster and started to take control. I pulled out my blade and sliced down my arms. I just had to cool the flames for a little while longer. Then I could unleash the, Fucking unleash hell on the cunts that started the fire.
“I have to report to Styx as soon as I found something—Prez’s orders. AK doesn’t know yet. I went off alone and found the fuckers.” I lifted my head when Smiler paused. Smiler watched Maddie through the window in the door. His jaw clenched. “If it was me, I’d want a shot at those cunts first. Alone.” Smiler lowered his head and his voice. “I know what it feels like to lose someone.”
“Slash?”
Smiler’s attention drifted down the hallway. He shrugged. His face went bright red. He looked pissed. “Him too,” Smiler said. “But no. Someone else.” He pointed his thumb in Maddie’s direction. “Someone like Maddie. She was to me, like Maddie is to you.” I didn’t understand who he meant. Smiler had no bitch. Maddie was my everything. I didn’t know Smiler had a bitch who was everything to him too.
He pulled a piece of paper from his cut. “Directions.” I took hold of them. “I gotta tell Styx they’re whereabouts in the morning. Figure, that’d give you a night’s head start, before we all ride to join you.” I read the directions and felt the evil lock into place inside me. Felt the darkness injecting my blood with the need for revenge. The flames rose high inside me, burning through flesh. I’d tried to keep them away for so long. Fought the demons for so fucking long. Fought them for Maddie, for Ash… there had been no point. They both got hurt in the end. I was weak. I couldn’t fight them this time. I was going to kill. I was going to rip apart the bastards who had done this to Maddie.