Total pages in book: 27
Estimated words: 24434 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 122(@200wpm)___ 98(@250wpm)___ 81(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 24434 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 122(@200wpm)___ 98(@250wpm)___ 81(@300wpm)
I do not want to leave this test behind in the bathroom garbage, no matter what the results are. I would be mortified if someone found it and somehow connected it to me. I will sneak it back to my desk and quickly stash it in my desk drawer until the end of the day. Then, I can find a good time to put it in to my purse without anyone seeing, and dispose of it in my bathroom garbage at home, where it is safe from being found.
But how on Earth am I going to get past a drunk Mira without having to talk to her? She’s going to know because she knows me too well. That girl has a sixth sense. Damnit. Oh, how I wish I brought my purse into the restroom with me.
I step back into the stall and close the door behind me, anxiously rubbing my eyes with the palms of my hands. The test is on the metal box in the stall, the plastic indicator so small and yet so consuming. I blink again, and glance at it. Then, I do a double take.
Did I just see what I think I did? I grab the test and my body begins to shake.
Two pink lines. I’m pregnant.
This is beyond unexpected. When I woke up this morning, I definitely did not think I would find out I was with child by lunch time! I should be scared, and adrenaline pumps through my body in wild rushes. I’m anxious, but at the same time, I’m also so unbelievably happy. I have to tell John, but what will he say? Will he accept our baby, or leave me to raise it by myself?
I don’t know, but I know what I have to do. And then I make a resolution. When I tell him about the baby, I’ll tell him that I love him too.
I take a moment to absorb everything, holding the test to my heart as my eyes fill with joyful tears. Then, I inhale deeply and pull myself together. I try to look as normal as possible heading back to my desk, although it feels like I’m walking on air.
Getting the test safely stashed away in my desk drawer is much easier than I anticipated. Mira is practically asleep at her desk by the time I leave the bathroom, and no one else really pays me any mind as I briskly make my way down the hall. I suppose it was silly of me to be so worried, because why would any of my co-workers want to know what I’m holding in my hand? My fingers curl around the plastic indicator, and I try to keep it slightly behind my body, in case I bump into someone.
Then, I arrive at my desk. Whew! I slip the pregnancy test into the top left drawer of my desk and sit down, letting out a sigh of relief. Now all I need to do is get through the last half of my workday, and then I’ll talk to John. I need to tell him that I love him, and that he’s granted me the gift of motherhood.
12
Megan
* * *
The rest of my day inches forward unbearably. I question if the clocks have all broken, causing time to stand still. I feel like I’m about to burst open with this news, and yet I can’t tell anyone yet. My head is spinning and I find it is hard to keep myself focused on work. Creating corporate ads seems such a mundane task in comparison to growing a baby. I decide to head to the break room to make some coffee in the hopes it will help get me through my day a little easier.
But then I realize that maybe I’m not supposed to drink coffee. Instead, I make myself a warm milk, and linger in the break room, sipping the hot drink. Debra brought in pastries this morning and there are a few lonely leftovers pushed to the corners of the container. I choose a Danish filled with raspberry jam and enjoy it very slowly, reveling in each bite. Anything to keep my mind in the present moment and off the excitement awaiting me this evening.
After a good amount of time has passed, I figure I should head back to my desk and try to knock out the new logos I’m producing for a window cleaning company. I’m already processing designs in my mind while walking back to my seat.
But then, I stop in my tracks, mid-bite. Brian is there. He’s in my cubicle, looking at something, although from this vantage point, I can’t see what he’s gazing at, although it’s definitely something in his hand.
Oh shit. Please, no.
Has Brian found my pregnancy test?
I feel a swell of rage and fear rush through my body. What was he doing going through my belongings? And how can he have the audacity to stand there, like nothing is wrong? I run over, trying to keep my voice low and even.