Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 81423 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 407(@200wpm)___ 326(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81423 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 407(@200wpm)___ 326(@250wpm)___ 271(@300wpm)
“Wow. I like it. You’ve always been deep, though. You make it sound like you’re not. All your songs feel like some version of a love song, or love poetry with music, and…I don’t know, maybe someone else? Though I’m not sure the core of your fan base sees them that way. That’s the feeling I always get.”
My heart felt like a battering ram, trying to break through my chest. There was static in my ears, and my head felt foggy. I fidgeted, tried to push past it, forced a smile. “That’s, um…the beauty of music, I guess. It’s something different for everyone. It’s whatever you need it to be.” The thing was, in a lot of ways, Scarlett was right. There were pieces of Law and pain in everything I wrote, even when it was buried. But twined around that was always my passion for music.
“Hmm…well, that’s definitely what I hear, and that leads me to ask…anyone new in your life? A special lady?”
My cheeks warmed, and my heart slowed a bit.
“Oh, wow, you’re smiling. That good, huh?” Scarlett asked.
Immediately I tried to school my features. I’d been smiling? I hadn’t even realized it. That question never made me grin, and it wasn’t supposed to be asked.
“Are you and Brittany back together?” she probed.
“Brittany is my friend and always will be.”
“I notice you didn’t say there isn’t a someone special, just not her. You’re slipping, Remington.” She winked. “You never talk about anyone you’re dating, and as far as I know, you’ve never been seen with anyone other than Brittany. I’m sure that contributed to some of the rumors over the years. Do you want to put those to rest today?”
Rumors. She meant gay rumors, only they were my truth. My heart spiked along with my anger. My hands were in fists as I bit down on my tongue, caught between the panic that was always beneath the surface and rage. One, two, three, four, five… “We’re here to talk about music. That’s all that should matter. It sure as hell shouldn’t matter who I’m sleeping with or not. Would who I’m with affect my music?”
Scarlett’s eyes widened slightly, obviously surprised by what I said. The few times this had happened before, it had always been met with blatant denial from me, from Steve. I’d never answered the way I just had, and I hadn’t even thought about it before I’d spoken, otherwise I likely wouldn’t have then either.
“Of course it wouldn’t, but your fans are curious.”
My stomach was in knots, my muscles too as I fought back the overwhelming feeling to bolt. It was like everyone’s eyes were on me, everyone in the room, the city, the world.
“He talks music, or we end this,” Crystal said with her phone in her hand. There was no doubt in my mind that she was texting Steve.
“Can’t blame a girl for being curious,” Scarlett replied.
The interview was pieces of scattered thoughts after that. I didn’t remember it happening or ending. The next thing I knew, I was stumbling onto the busy New York sidewalk, gasping for air.
The click of Crystal’s heels was right behind me. “Steve wants you at the office.”
I whipped around to face her. “Now he wants me at the office? He’s been ignoring my calls since yesterday, but I didn’t answer a question the way he wants and suddenly he’s available?”
Crystal held up her hands. “Don’t shoot the messenger.”
“You texted him like I’m a child and you’re babysitting me. It’s my life, Crystal.”
We’d stopped moving, but I wasn’t sure exactly when. She frowned, the remorse evident in her wide, brown eyes. “I know. I’m only doing my job. I don’t know all the details—and you’re right; your life is yours—but for what it’s worth, I don’t think you should have to hide who you are, if that’s what you’re doing.”
I sighed, appreciative of her words, but knowing my own truth in it. “There was a time when there was nothing I wanted more than to hide. Part of me still does for certain reasons, but I…I can’t do it anymore. And I know there are things to consider both professionally and personally, but…I don’t want to be alone forever,” I admitted.
“You shouldn’t have to be.” She threaded her arm through mine. “Come on. I might be on your side, but I still need to get you to Steve.”
“I have a few things I need to say to him myself.”
It was only a couple of stops on the subway. The second I was in the lobby of Steve’s office, I ignored the receptionist outside and went straight for the door.
“Remington, you can’t—”
“He’s expecting me,” I cut her off.
Steve’s head snapped up, his eyes searing into mine the moment I stepped inside. “What the hell was that, kid?”
“That was nothing! I didn’t even say anything!”