Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 68074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 68074 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
I had been obsessing about his character and what he might have done to end up on the wrong side of the law. But he was a saint, loyal to a fault, willing to brave the worst of what society had to offer to save his friend.
“Does your mom know?” I asked, because suddenly Mrs. Newbury’s acidic tone didn’t make sense. If she knew her son had been so selfless, why did she feel the need to throw his past in my face?
“No.” He shook his head. “And she can’t. No one knows. Only you and me and Porter.”
“But why?” I persisted. “If you just tell your parents, they’ll understand. It would be a relief for them to know that you’re innocent.”
“I’ve told them I’m innocent,” he insisted. “If they had any trust in me, they would accept that without having to hear the whole story. I can’t tell them about Porter, or he would be in trouble again.”
“But surely you can tell your parents,” I argued. “They would be happy to know the truth and I’m sure they wouldn’t make trouble for Porter.”
Mike nodded, considering it. He held out a hand to me, and I went to him, settling myself down on his lap. I circled his neck with my arms and feathered loving kisses across his brow.
“You don’t think I’m a fool?” he asked, his eyes wide and full of pain.
“No,” I answered. “I think you’re very brave. And a hell of a friend.”
He trailed one finger up and down my thigh. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before.”
“It’s okay,” I said quickly, thinking of my own deceit. “You didn’t know you could trust me.”
“It wasn’t that,” he objected. “I was afraid you wouldn’t like me. I was afraid it would chase you off.”
“Well, it didn’t. I have nothing but more respect for you.” I said firmly.
He leaned back, planting his palm firmly against my thigh. “My mom drug tests me every chance she gets. Everyone in town looks at me suspiciously. I can’t run a tab at the Lucky Lady. My manager thinks I’m an idiot.”
I kissed him on the nose. “If they knew…”
“But they can’t know,” he sighed. “Now, I’ve told you my secret. What is it that you wanted to tell me?”
I panicked. Sitting on his lap, I could feel my muscles tense, and I knew he felt it too. I tried to force myself to relax. “It’s nothing important.” Nothing important? It was only the rest of our lives, and the lives of our children and grandchildren. Why was it so hard to break through this paralysis? To say two little words that would either bring us together or tear us apart? Mike had been so brave, laying his entire struggle bare for me. Why couldn’t I do the same?
“I won’t push you,” Mike said, reading more truth in my actions than my words. “I know it’s important, but you can tell me in your own time.”
I laid my head down against his chest. “Thank you.” I couldn’t stop a tear from sliding down my cheek. He was so good to me. I had a terrible feeling that I was going to ruin everything. I just wanted one more night of bliss before the whole experiment came to an end. Despite all my promises to Lindsey, Macy, and myself, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t risk Mike’s affections, even if it meant lying to him. I was just a scaredy-cat—that’s all there was to it. I could trust him, but he couldn’t trust me. I allowed him to hold me, feeling guilty and relieved all at the same time. My story would be a burden for another day.
23
MIKE
Iwoke up to Tammy’s sweet form draped across my chest. Her pajamas barely contained her breasts, pressed up against me. The intoxicating swell of her hip drew my hand like a magnet. Thank goodness we had put the lie past us, and I was able to be my true self with her again. Now that it was over, I felt a weight had been lifted. Of course she was supportive—I had always known she would be. I conveniently forgot the heartache of deliberations and how convinced I had been that she would dump me for another man.
She was the perfect girlfriend, beautiful and supportive. I had never told anyone the whole story before. Porter already knew; I didn’t have to tell him. I had only told parts of the truth to the police when I pointed the finger at the drug dealers. My cellmates and my parole officer only knew that I was doing my best to change my life around. Even my parents, though I had been open with them about my innocence, hadn’t heard all of it. They didn’t know I had fallen on my sword. They didn’t know I was protecting anyone.