Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 86226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 431(@200wpm)___ 345(@250wpm)___ 287(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86226 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 431(@200wpm)___ 345(@250wpm)___ 287(@300wpm)
“Right. Some would even say we’re feared and respected even more.”
“Your point?” I’m not sure what she is getting at.
“Our grandfather was able to rule with an iron fist, but he was never that way with Grandmother. He loved her. Cherished her. There wasn’t a thing he wouldn’t do for her. He was the same with us when we were young. He softened at home, but no one ever saw that side of him beyond our four walls.”
“He was a good man,” I agree.
“So, why are you completely ruling out doing the same? Is it so unheard of that you can’t have a family?”
I point to the attic. “Look around, dear sister. I think the answer is clear.”
“It doesn’t have to be, brother. You have a son or daughter coming.”
“You’ve never been one to not just get straight to the point. Where are you going with this?”
Athena leans back in her chair. “When you came up with this crazy idea of having Ani pay for lying to you via her body, and then having your baby, it was crazy. But you do you, brother. No matter how much of a psychopathic idea it may be. And I saw your point about having a baby to keep the Godwin family name alive and not just be the child of Daphne who both of us will never trust. But the reality is, you started a family. Whether you want to face that fact or not, you did.”
“So, are you saying you want my psychopathic ass to raise this baby? Try to be a good father?”
“I’m just wondering why you’ve ruled that out?”
I lean forward on the desk and lock my eyes with my sister. “We’ve talked about this and all the reasons why.”
“I know. I guess I’m second-guessing your decision. It feels weak. Like the decision was made from a place of fear. I don’t like the way that feels,” Athena admits. “We are motherfucking Godwins. We don’t cower in the shadows.”
I know what she is talking about. Ever since leaving Ani on the bed with her heart ripped out, I couldn’t shake my own level of sadness. I did feel weak, but then again, I’ve never claimed to be a strong man. I’ve left that role for my siblings.
“She deserves better than me,” I say.
Athena smirks. “She sure as fuck does. I won’t argue there.”
“So, what are we saying here?” My heart speeds up, and my brain swirls with possibilities. The heavy, thick depression that has been plaguing me since my arrival back in the attic seems to be dissipating as our discussion progresses.
“You told me Ani said she wanted to be with you. She said she loved you.”
I nod.
“You have a woman who sees you for who you are. She knows what you do in the shadows and isn’t asking for you to quit being who you are. She’s open to your darkness. She’s willing to have your baby and not demanding anything for it.”
“Not to mention her sexual tastes mesh with my kinky ass,” I say with a small chuckle.
Athena makes a gagging sound and scowls. “Too much information.”
“But she did lie to me. She got Apollo into what could be a mess later. She’s still Daphne’s sister.”
Athena’s smile fades. “True, and there is a part of me that wonders if I can truly ever trust her to be part of the Godwin family. I don’t trust. I don’t forgive. I don’t allow someone in. I know this. And you’re the same way.”
“We don’t trust, or we risk everything for letting our guard down. It’s how we survive. Or at least, it has been our creed up until now.”
I pause for a long moment. “I think I’m over all that. My gut tells me she isn’t the person I believed her to be. I see good,” I admit, or maybe even defend. Athena hasn’t seen what I have, but Ani is… more than what I ever gave her credit for.
Athena surprisingly nods in agreement. “I think you’re right. You’ve always had a good gut instinct.”
“Let me ask you a serious question,” I say. “If I marry her. Claim her and the baby as mine forever. Do you really see her becoming part of the Godwin family? Or do you see her resisting like Daphne did?”
“Only you can answer that,” Athena fires back. “Do you love her?”
“Well, I sure as fuck wasn’t planning on falling in love with the woman when this all began,” I answer.
I stand up and pace the room. I don’t do relationships. True relationships. And the women I’ve had in the past—no matter how insignificant they were—I have never loved. Quite the opposite. I am overprotective, over-possessive, and what is mine is mine, but I never love.
Mine.
Ani is not just mine… I love her.
Am I going to be all right with that fact? It has given her power. My love will forever be a chink in my armor.