Total pages in book: 140
Estimated words: 129207 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129207 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 517(@250wpm)___ 431(@300wpm)
“Yeah, alright,” I mutter, hating every moment of this. The last thing I ever wanted was for Rae to be unhappy, and if Axel is right, and there really is something going on, then he needs to be there to make it okay. “Apart from college and her bullshit professor, how’s she doing?”
Axel lifts his gaze as his brow arches. “You know, she’ll never admit it, but she misses you. I think that’s part of whatever this is. Maybe she’s all up in her feelings,” he suggests, his gaze falling out the window and falling into a deep silence for the quickest moment. “You should come with me.”
I scoff, the idea of me showing up uninvited in her dorm room almost comical. “Yeah, right. That’ll go down well. Besides, if she’s having a hard time, the last thing she needs is me coming and making things worse.”
“Yeah, maybe you’re right,” he says, letting out a heavy breath. He reclines his seat, his head tilted back against the headrest, staring up at the ceiling of the cabin, and it’s clear that whatever is going through his head is deep enough to bring him down.
A minute of silence turns into ten before he sits back up again, his elbows braced against his knees, a somber expression on his face. “I think we fucked up leaving her behind. She needs you.”
Fuck. Why did that gut me so violently?
I shake my head, trying to shake off the uneasiness coursing through my veins. He couldn’t be more wrong. I’m everything she doesn’t need. “No, she might think she needs me, but she doesn’t. I’m not the guy she’s missing anymore. I haven’t been in years. This life isn’t for her,” I tell him. We may be living the dream, but the double-edged sword of fame cuts deeply, and the last thing I’d ever want is for her to see me this way. “She’s going to finish college with her fancy degree and make something of herself, not get caught up in this bullshit. Besides, I’m a fucking mess. Nobody needs this.”
A cocky grin creeps across his face, and without a doubt, I know there’s a sharp retort sitting right on the end of his tongue. It’s a miracle he’s able to swallow it before managing to put a proper response together. “Well, maybe she doesn’t need you, but you sure as fuck need her.”
Shit. Just when I thought I was off the hook, I’m right back in the deep end.
I clench my jaw, refusing to respond because fuck knows he’s right. The second I got on a flight and left Michigan behind, my world spiraled, and it hasn’t stopped since.
Raleigh is my compass, and without her, I’m fucking lost, but like I said, she deserves better than this life, better than anything I could ever give her.
“So, I’ve been upgraded to Devil Spawn, huh?” I ask, swiftly changing the topic but doing anything in my power to keep talking about her. It’s rare he unloads about her like this. He keeps it to himself to keep me from falling to pieces, but I need to hear it more than I need my next breath.
Axel shrugs his shoulders, his lips quirking into a small smile. “It’s better than when she referred to you as The Epic Mistake.”
I cringe. That one still stings, but it did create a bestseller. “You’re not wrong!”
“I’m never wrong.”
I roll my eyes and settle in for the next seven hours of the flight, assuming the conversation is over, only when he volunteers more, I listen up like a starved animal begging for scraps. “When I called her, she’d just walked out on a date.”
“A date?” I ask, my heart pounding erratically in my chest. We’ve spoken on every topic under the sun when it comes to Raleigh Stone over these past six years, but never about her dating.
For the most part, I had assumed she wasn’t interested, that a part of her was still mine, and that the thought of being with another man made her as sick as I feel now.
How fucking conceited could I be?
Of course she’s not waiting around for me. She’s fucking beautiful and has so much to offer someone. I’m sure she probably goes out of her way to avoid it, but I know she’s aware of the lifestyle I lead, and if I’m sinking into a different woman every night, why shouldn’t she be with any man she wants?
Fuck. Maybe I’m stuck in the past, but a part of me had always thought I’d be her first.
“Mm-hmm,” Axel responds as his hand curls into a tight fist. “The fucker treated her like shit. Kept her waiting half the night and then assumed he could fuck her for a chance at getting closer to me.”
Shit. There’s that nausea rolling up on me again.