Series: Star Moon Pack Series by J.L. Beck
Total pages in book: 127
Estimated words: 118781 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 594(@200wpm)___ 475(@250wpm)___ 396(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 118781 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 594(@200wpm)___ 475(@250wpm)___ 396(@300wpm)
“Every minute she stays here, she’s in danger,” I mutter, staring at the door, knowing she’s on the other side. Waiting. Does she know? Can she guess?
“What are you suggesting?”
“Dad,” I groan, closing my eyes. “Don’t make me say it.”
“There’s no escaping this. If I could, I would take it from you, I swear, I would. But it has to be done. She can’t stay here. Not only does it put her in greater danger, but it endangers the pack if these invasions increase. We can’t allow that.”
“You think I don’t know that?” I whisper, wanting to spare her the pain of overhearing. My fist touches my chest, behind which the wolf is suffering. “I knew it in here before she’d hardly started speaking. I know it’s the only way. But why does it have to be? Why do I have to let her go?”
“Unfortunately, that’s the double-edged sword we all carry, those of us who choose our mates instead of waiting for Fate to decide. There’s always a chance of something going wrong.”
“There’s always a chance of something going wrong for anyone, for any reason.”
“That’s also true.” He strokes his jaw, finally letting out a weary sigh. “There’s never any knowing how things will end. But, son, this must end. You have to send her away. The bond will break if you declare it so.”
But damn it, I don’t want to. I grind my teeth, fighting with every scrap of self-control not to scream the words. Not to beat him and shout and wail.
I don’t need to, anyway. The pity in his eyes tells me he understands too well what I’m thinking. “Son, it’s either this or you risk everything. All of us. That’s unacceptable. She has to go.”
What’s the point of fighting it? All it does is cause more grief. “I know. I know what I have to do.”
“Think of your mother, me, your brother. Sadly, every alpha must do this at one time or another. Choosing between what he wants most of all and what the pack needs.”
“But did it have to be something like this?”
“It’s unfair. I know.” He’s never spoken to me this way before, has never been this understanding. I wish that gave me any comfort, being understood. It doesn’t change anything. I still have to turn my back on the woman I love. And it’s not even her fault—she did nothing to bring this on herself. She was simply born who she is.
And I marked her. The biggest mistake of my life. Not that I would trade a minute of our time together, but all it’s done is cause her pain in the end.
But that’s nothing compared to the pain I’m about to cause her now.
“Believe me, son, if everything I’ve ever heard is true, as soon as you make up your mind to break the bond, this won’t be as difficult. You’ll start to pull away. The wolf will begin to pull away from hers. It won’t take long.”
Like I give a shit what this does to me. It’s already killing me as it is, but I’ll deal with it. I deserve it for getting myself into this situation and dragging Lili along with me. All I can do is think of what this will do to her.
But I can’t. All I’m doing is torturing myself. I have to be on top of my game here, for the pack, if nothing else. Just because she won’t be here anymore doesn’t mean the necromancers won’t keep coming at us to get to her. If anything, they’ll be that much more determined to move through our territory and into hers if they find out she’s there.
All I’ll be able to do is fight to my dying breath to make sure that doesn’t happen. Every minute of training, every fight, all of it, will be with her in mind. No matter if the bond is there or not.
That’s all I can do for her now.
I square my shoulders and take a deep breath before opening the door. She’s the only one in the hallway, leaning against the wall opposite where I’m standing, her arms folded, staring at the floor. Her hair hangs in a silver sheet along both sides of her face, and the ache in my chest is enough that I’m afraid it will kill me. Tight, intense, and burning. Now I wish she would tear out my heart. It would take the pain away.
“Come with me.” I hold out my hand. “Please.”
She doesn’t meet my gaze but does as I ask, placing her hand in mine and allowing me to lead her away from the study. “I know what needs to happen,” she whispers. “I was a mistake. I’ve always been a mistake.”
“Lili…”
“No, it’s true. Everybody knew, even before I did. I was always a freak. There was something wrong with me, I never fit in. I never fit anywhere. And now I understand why. It would have been better if I were never born, so none of this would’ve happened.”