Total pages in book: 29
Estimated words: 26698 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 133(@200wpm)___ 107(@250wpm)___ 89(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 26698 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 133(@200wpm)___ 107(@250wpm)___ 89(@300wpm)
And I’ll do it gladly.
But fer now, I have to get this fecker out of here and clean the mess on the floor. My thoughts about Clover and what we’re goin’ta do will have ta wait until later.
ELEVEN
CLOVER
It’s been a long day, and I’m about to close when the door swings open and Sully saunters in. His gaze tracks me easily, and I’m frozen in place. I haven’t seen him since he snuck out of my apartment yesterday, and he hasn’t called, which makes me wonder what he’s doing here. I’m not about to sleep with him again until he gives me answers. And even then, I’m not sure I would.
I’m lying to myself, though. This man has a hold on me. One I didn’t expect.
“What are you doing here?”
“Invitin’ ye to a party,” he tells me before slipping onto the bar stool. “It’s Paddy’s Day.”
I can’t help but smile. “I know it is, which is why it took me so long to get everyone out of here earlier.”
Thankfully, I was able to empty the pub by eleven. Most have gone off to do their own thing. I wanted to be a part of the celebrations, but I couldn’t bring myself to go out.
“Come to a party with me,” he says. A glint of mischief dances in his eyes.
I look at Sully as he watches me. He must know I’m hiding things from him. But I’m afraid he’ll hate me if I tell him. There’s nothing more to do here but come clean.
“I don’t know,” I say finally, realizing I hadn’t responded about the party.
Sully pushes off the chair and makes his way toward me. “Please, even if ye stay fer a short wee while.”
I can’t deny him the request. As much as I know I should. So much has changed since we met two months ago in that damn rehab. And last night, I want to say was a mistake, but I would be lying.
I nod slowly, and it causes him to smile. It’s that bright, happy fucking grin that makes my heart beat so much faster. He doesn’t realize he’s doing it, but it’s so clear he has an affect on me. It’s no longer a lie, or hidden away. It’s real. And I don’t know how he’s going to react when he learns the truth.
I respond with a smile and a roll of my eyes, “Fine.”
I should have never come to the party. But as I look at each of these men and women, I realize just how beautiful their connection is. They’re loyal, honest, and there is a sense of belonging, even though none of them truly fit.
I watch the women chatter amongst themselves. The party has a life of its own, and as they move together, each person slotting into spaces where they clearly belong, I’ve never felt more out of place.
When I’m alone with Sully, it’s different. He makes me feel different. There are such clear emotions involved, and even though I’ve been through so much, I can’t stop myself, my heart especially, from wanting him. He’s been on my mind since I woke in the morning to find him gone. I didn’t want to admit to myself that he’s gotten under my skin.
But it’s what’s happened since I left rehab that’s been haunting me even more. When I agreed to take on the bar, I also made a decision that could fuck all of this up. Sully glances at me from where he’s standing with Monster, and he smiles.
“You seem to be lost in your thoughts,” Rev says as he sidles up beside me, capturing my attention.
He’s been friendly, welcoming me with a warm greeting and a gentle smile. I want to talk to someone about what’s going on in my head, the war that’s so clearly raging back and forth. Maybe I can ask him for advice without actually going into too much detail.
“There are times my mind drags me away from the present,” I tell him honestly.
It’s one of the few things I’ve come to terms with, and I haven’t fought it. I’ve allowed the memories to take hold when they need to, and I’ve worked through them. But it still makes my chest ache.
“I understand.” He sighs wistfully, as if he’s thinking about his own troubles.
I glance at him. “You do?”
“Many times over the years, I’ve had to consider what I wanted from life. I did go into the seminary for a few years, and while I loved helpin’ others, I knew the church would not fulfil me in the way I needed.” He doesn’t look at me as he’s talking, his focus on the people he calls family.
I’m not sure how to explain it, but there’s a calmness that seems to follow him. However, in saying that, he’s also got demons. For someone who’s a priest and offers sound advice, I can tell he is dangerous in his own right.