Series: Willow Winters
Total pages in book: 53
Estimated words: 50025 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 50025 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 250(@200wpm)___ 200(@250wpm)___ 167(@300wpm)
The fall breeze blows in through the cracked windows of the downstairs office, bringing in with it the faint smells of the season. The crisp autumn has always felt like home in some ways.
The cool air wraps around my shoulders as I sink deeper into the corner of the sofa with my laptop balanced on a throw pillow. I have to readjust so I’m not sitting on my flannel button-down top. Paired with faded light blue jeans, the outfit is one of my favorites for fall.
Not quite chic or uptown, but Zander said he liked it this morning.
I peek up through the doorway, knowing he’s in the sitting room with Cade going over details I don’t want or need to be privy to. He looked cute today too. In just blue jeans and a worn black tee. It amazes me how expensive and authoritative he appears, even in the simplest blue-collar attire.
My focus returns to the screen in front of me as I scan a listing in Miami and then email the link to Kam. Smirking, I can already hear him joking about retiring in Florida.
We could retire if we wanted. We could start completely fresh, just me and Z. We could hide away and go off the grid if we wanted. We can do whatever we want.
Or we could continue maintaining the status quo. I would be content with that. Although part of me thinks it’s all just a fantasy and that once The Firm is gone, Zander will leave too.
I click over my tab to the email with The Firm suggesting to the judge that another psych eval be done. One to determine my competency. And for another doctor to be brought in once their term has ended, someone who will take over with my care plan.
It’s odd to read it, this plan and schedule for a potential release of conservatorship. There’s a fear there too, wondering if everything will be okay once they’re gone. At that thought, I know it will be, so long as I still have Z.
Instinctively, I click over to another tab and read the tabloids with a Cheshire cat grin. Biting down on my bottom lip to keep my giddiness contained, I read the article again.
There’s the mention of a possible baby and rumors swirling in the comments. All because of a hand on my stomach in one picture snapped. There’s nothing to that rumor but it brings up all the hopes I had with James.
We wanted a baby. Once we finally settled down, we both wanted a baby. And now that will never happen. When I was in my late teens and twenties, the idea of an infant gave me hives. How could I possibly be a mother when I can hardly care for myself?
Now, even knowing how lacking I am, I know I would love a baby. I would give that baby the world. When we bought this house, we’d planned to start a family here, knowing there’d be plenty of room to expand. That was what sealed the deal for us. Now everything has changed and it’s so empty here.
Tormented emotions swirl deep in the pit of my stomach and I have to close the laptop, swallowing thickly and reminding myself that it’s okay. The front door opens and closes, and the sound of it makes me pull myself together.
That was the past, and now I have the future to look forward to. Clearing my throat, I set the laptop to the side and do what I can to shake off the heavy feelings.
I have no idea if Zander even wants a child or what he would think of having a baby with me. Or whether I should. The last thing I want is for a child to be brought up in this world as fucked up as me.
“That’s not what was agreed upon.” Cade’s voice is harsh and it echoes down the hall. The cracked door carries the heavy footsteps of him leaving and a remark from Kam that I can barely hear. I’m slow to move, and quiet as I can be, attempting to eavesdrop on what appears to be a tense conversation.
With the footsteps getting closer, I stay perfectly still by the door. Cade’s shadow passes and I peek through to see his back as he goes out the back way.
The sliding door is faintly heard over my rapidly beating heart as I listen to Z and Kam argue.
Something about money. Something about a note.
A chill sends pricks down my arm and I move without thinking. Numbly I make my way to them in the sitting room. I only hesitate outside the door for a moment. It’s the statement “I don’t know if we should tell her” spoken from Zander that has me pushing the door open. The hinges creak, announcing my arrival in an eerie manner.