Total pages in book: 31
Estimated words: 30148 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 151(@200wpm)___ 121(@250wpm)___ 100(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 30148 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 151(@200wpm)___ 121(@250wpm)___ 100(@300wpm)
Failure as soon as she got sick became my kryptonite, not just in life but also in friendships. The fear of letting people down. My biggest insecurity was not being what people expected and falling short.
Her hand dropped, and her head turned to the side as she sighed and fell asleep again. Our morning ritual was done. Now, it was time to get the mail or package or whatever had been delivered.
The floor creaked as I walked over and reached for the bronze door handle. Our house was expensive and in a prestigious part of Portland, so we didn’t have knobs. Instead, we had this weird giant handle that made you feel like you were in a castle and not the suburbs by the river.
I shoved it down and looked out.
A simple brown box sat on the doorstep, and it was addressed to me. I was leery after the rooster had somehow planted itself on our property, but I assumed that was probably Hazel’s weird prank. A rooster. Congrats, it worked.
I shook the box, and my head was all like, “Oh, you know, just in case it’s a bomb,” not thinking far enough ahead that if it were a bomb, I would be dead.
All men are idiots, apparently.
I even shook it again after that errant thought and then started pulling away the tape, only to open it and see a simple black razor with a note.
Nobody wants to marry the Beast in real life. They only tolerate him for the library. Shave that scratch before you end up alone. Oh, and even if you had a library…—Garfield-wearing Hazel
I picked up the razor and clutched it in my hand
I’d like to say the war ended there.
But what followed was a constant battle of wills.
The next Friday, Hazel woke up to find Jane Eyre with instructions on how to read books. I was very detailed.
She followed that up with three types of organic soap because she said I looked like I’d never used it a day in my life.
I followed that up with crickets in her house. Okay, not a proud moment, but I was at a loss for something to continue this weird banter because at least it distracted me from my mom’s failing health and my dad’s return, where he’d most likely see her and collapse in front of me. Meaning I had to take care of everyone physically and emotionally. I wasn’t really sure I had a lot left to do that.
I was already struggling, so I focused on the girl next door, her hate for me, and her cute way of showing it.
After the crickets, though, things went deathly silent. A worry for sure. My mom even asked what was next, and all I could give her was, “The apocalypse. Brace yourself.”
A week later, I came to the conclusion that she was either bored or gave up. It annoyed me that the last thing I saw when I closed my eyes was her light shutting off as if I were off, too.
Gone.
Forgotten.
Chapter Six
“Note to self: Women have memories of steel. Damn Bigfoot.”—August Wellington
Hazel
I would end him.
And wait until it was dark.
Was I losing it? Probably. Was this fun? Absolutely. Every time he opened a gift or saw a prank, I laughed and wondered why he didn’t just straight up come over and say something. Instead, he just responded.
It became our summer game, and while I loathed how I was treated and made fun of in high school, I kind of loved the attention now.
Maybe it would last a month or two. Perhaps it would end. But for the next few weeks, he was my hazard to hold, and I’d take it to my grave.
The clincher after he sent me the book, and I sent him special soap, was a pink princess blanket. You’d think it wasn’t a big deal, but it had Disney princesses all over it. I didn’t even care if he didn’t know, but my great-grandma always told me to pick one, whatever princess I wanted to be. I was allowed to be her and changed my mind often, so looking at that blanket with literally every princess on it made me feel like he was crawling inside my psyche and trying to mess with me. Maybe that was why I went off the deep end. Who knew?
It had been a few days, and I knew he was antsy—not that I was stalking him or anything. But I saw the curtains pulled, and glanced from the tree when he went to the side yard and stared at our house like he was guarding his property against me.
So, to throw him off, I took a few days off to retaliate. This time, I knew I’d get him good.
He’d always had a fear of Bigfoot. I wasn’t sure why other than that it was rumored to be in the Pacific Northwest. So, I splurged and went on Amazon to buy a Bigfoot costume. All I needed was to sneak into the house or climb up to his window. But when I put the costume on, it was too big, so it was hard to see through the eyes. Not to mention that it smelled like rubber inside the mask, and if any hunter saw me, they’d probably shoot me on sight for both meat and glory. But whatever, I could run fast.