Total pages in book: 141
Estimated words: 128585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 643(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 643(@200wpm)___ 514(@250wpm)___ 429(@300wpm)
Lowering my head, slow and steady, I brought his length to my lips. Arthur grunted as I swirled my tongue around the tip then took him inside my mouth. His hands left my shoulders and fixed on the side of my head. I expected him to be rough, to thrust inside my mouth and grip my face. But he didn’t. He let me take him as I wanted. And when I looked up, he was watching me. Watching me with a lost expression on his face. Gritting his teeth, skin flushed, but so, so out of his depth.
This was as unsure as I believed Arthur could get. My heart shattered for him. Had he only ever believed that sex should be rough and casual? Had he never craved the deep, meaningful connection that I knew existed between soulmates? That I believed could exist between us?
I got to my feet and pressed my hands on his hard chest. Arthur lay back on the bed, allowing me to take charge. I climbed over his muscled body, straddling his thighs, and I kissed him. I kissed him with a tenderness I knew he had never experienced. He kissed me back, and I wanted to cry at this man allowing me to take control.
My tongue slid alongside his, caressing… just feeling and tasting and kissing. I pulled back and searched his face. I smiled, but something dark flashed across Arthur’s face and he growled and flipped me onto my back. He caged me in his arms and glared down at me like I was the worst kind of rival. His eyes grew wide under his glasses. They closed, and I could see movement under his eyelids. I knew he was fighting with himself, fighting back the demons that lived within his darkened soul. His muscles were tensed, and I could tell he was struggling to relax, to let go.
To let us just be …
“I love you,” I murmured again, and Arthur’s eyes snapped open. I’d noticed that every time I said it, it was as though he couldn’t believe it. As though he didn’t believe himself worthy … he didn’t believe himself loveable …
I froze. That was it. That was why he only ever fucked. That was why he never showed a reaction to anything. He stayed hidden behind the safety of the high walls he had erected long ago because he didn’t think he was worthy of love.
Arthur’s skin was clammy—the only tell that this was affecting him in any way. That this, my words of love and adoration, were breaking through thickened, battle-scarred skin.
“I love you,” I said again, and he pulled back, sitting on his heels. He raked his hands through his hair, looking around the room as if he needed an escape, as if he needed to be anywhere but on this bed with me. As if he couldn’t stand to be told that he was loved.
I got to my knees and met his eyes. His neck was corded with strain, and the veins in his defined muscles protruded through his skin.
I cupped his face. He tried to pull away, but I held on tightly. He didn’t fight me as much as I’d feared. He grasped my wrists as if to throw me away. But instead his hands held me like a lifeline, the way Gene had gripped onto Charlie, as if he would plummet into freezing depths if he didn’t keep tight hold of me.
I moved in slowly, kissing along his stubbled cheek until my lips met his. I kissed him. I kissed him softly, showing him the love I felt for him. The love I now knew he had been denied for so long. A love I knew he had no idea what to do with.
I guided him on top of me as I lay back on the bed. He crawled above me, breathing heavily. I held Arthur’s face, then let him be the one to kiss me. He inched his face closer to mine, his breath stuttered and unsteady. Then his lips met mine, and he kissed me. He didn’t ravish me. He kissed me the way I’d always dreamed he could and someday would.
And once he started, he didn’t stop. Arthur kissed my mouth; he kissed my neck and over my breasts. He kissed down my stomach and reached between my thighs. I widened my legs, and he dropped his head and licked along my core. My head rolled back as his tongue licked my clit, then down to my entrance.
“Arthur,” I murmured, lost in the pleasure, lost in the gentleness, the softness. I stroked my fingers through his hair and looked down as he took me with his mouth. His hands were on my thighs, only moving to push a finger inside me. His tongue and finger worked me faster and faster until my back arched and I broke apart.