Total pages in book: 135
Estimated words: 129912 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 650(@200wpm)___ 520(@250wpm)___ 433(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129912 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 650(@200wpm)___ 520(@250wpm)___ 433(@300wpm)
“When it comes to Killian, that memory has never left him. He remembers how awful his father was, how ruthless and angry. And to this day, it has made my boy angry. He refuses to be weak because he knows that feeling. He lacks trust because he couldn’t even trust his own father. But no matter what, I made sure his life thereafter was good. I made sure it was worth living.
“My point is, you are an incredible woman, dear. Life is scary and threats are everywhere, but I have no doubt you’ll do the right thing by your child. You and Caz. He’s afraid now, but there is nothing that nephew of mine won’t do to protect you and his baby. So go. Go now and talk to him. Tell him that everything will be okay, even if you don’t believe it yourself just yet. And when you convince him that it will be, find a mirror and repeat those words to yourself until you’re left with no choice but to accept it.”
FORTY-SIX
WILLOW
My mind is still boggled after hearing a piece of Maeve’s past. It all makes sense now, though, the way Caz’s cousins are.
Juniper with her rebellious streak and demand for respect.
Rowan with his easy-going nature.
Killian with his quick temper and extreme lack of trust.
Yes, it all makes sense now.
I leave the kitchen to search for Caz. I check his office but he’s not there, so I carry myself up the staircase until I’ve reached our room. He’s not here either, and the curtains are drawn together so he can’t be on the terrace.
I walk one more floor up, hoping he’s where I think he is.
When I see black curtains flapping with the breeze, I sigh with relief. Behind the curtains are double doors that lead to a broader terrace.
We spend a lot of time up here, eating breakfast and lunch or even having a drink or two on a light night.
I step out to find Caz near a black pillar, one hand buried in his pocket and a bloom pinched between his fingers. His shoulder rests against the pillar as he stares at the ocean ahead of him.
The moon bathes one half of his face in silvery white light, and the breeze makes the loose tendrils of his dark hair shift with the wind.
“Hi, Caspy.”
He turns his head a fraction to eye me. I’m glad to see a faint smile appear, despite the heaviness that lingers.
When I get closer to him, he stabs the lit end of his bloom out into the built-in marble bench next to him.
“Should probably give these up now.” His voice is raspy. He clears his throat.
I stand in front of him as he straightens his back. Slowly, his misty eyes lift from the floor to mine.
“Are you okay?” I ask. “I feel like no one asks that around here. They especially don’t ask you.”
He huffs mockingly. “They know I have no choice but to be okay.”
“Caz.” My voice, though soft, has a firm edge to it.
He looks me deep in the eyes and sighs, lowering his chin. “I don’t know if I can handle this, Willow.”
“Handle what?”
“The Regals. This unknown power inside me. The baby that I’ve placed in your womb.” His throat bobs. “I know we’ve discussed this before, but I never thought I’d have children of my own. I’m not worthy of being a father. I’ll only fuck them up.”
“I don’t believe that.” I grab his hand and cup it with both of mine. “I believe you’re worthy of so much more than you think. Even The Regals seem to believe that.”
“The Regals don’t give two shits about me. All they care about is my blood and my energy.” He tilts his chin to stare up at the star splattered sky. “I feel like my entire life has been a lie. It seems everything I’ve been through—the suffering, the lies, the abuse—could’ve been prevented. And that my mother…that she would still be alive if The Regals had stepped into my life sooner.”
“I don’t think it worked that way. I’m not sure they were allowed to intervene at all. And with Decius, they likely knew he could torment you all he wanted, but he wouldn’t have been able to act without waking Selah. After having that dinner with them at Council Castle, I don’t think he ever intended on waking her. He wanted your power for himself, and I think he was trying to figure out how to keep it without involving her. But Yuri seems adamant about all this, even if he isn’t physically alive. He needs you as his warrior. That must mean something, right?”
“I don’t know.” His eyes drop again, and his lashes are like short black feathers caressing his cheekbones. “Truthfully, I don’t give a fuck about this Regal issue. All I care about is you.” He presses a hand to my belly, and those cerulean eyes lock on mine. “Maeve’s question is important. Are you happy with this outcome?”