Total pages in book: 138
Estimated words: 130307 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 652(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 130307 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 652(@200wpm)___ 521(@250wpm)___ 434(@300wpm)
Every time this man said the word sex, my body wound itself tighter and tighter. I felt like I might shatter into a thousand pieces if he said it one more time.
“I can do that.”
He blinked, as if he hadn’t heard me correctly. “You can… do that.”
I nodded, heart thundering with excitement that I tried to tamp down.
“You’re okay with just having a physical relationship, with no other ties, no other promises for more,” he said slowly.
“Yep.”
“This is not a relationship, and never will be,” he said again, like he was sure I hadn’t heard correctly.
“Good. I can’t date anyone, anyway.”
He frowned at that, opening his mouth like he wanted details on the can’t, but then he changed his mind.
His throat constricted, and he leaned forward just marginally over the table.
“No kissing.”
“No kissing,” I agreed, even though I very much wanted to kiss. I understood the boundary. Kissing was intimate — maybe even more so than having sex.
At least, I could imagine. Not that I’d know.
“And you can’t fall in love with me.”
“You can’t fall in love with me,” I repeated, heart hammering even at the thought. I could just hear my mom’s disappointment if I told her this job I’d taken to set up my future and stability turned into me being in a relationship I promised her there was no chance of.
Will almost smiled, his eyes lighting with curiosity. “You think I’d be the one to fall in love?”
“Obviously. Have you seen me?”
I gestured to my old, ratty pajamas that I’d sewn back when I first started learning, the pattern a god-awful, multi-colored tie-dye that deserved to die in the late 90s.
I needed a joke right now, because the heaviness in the room was enough to suffocate me.
Will’s eyes raked down the length of me, amusement in his eyes. But as per usual, he didn’t laugh. He didn’t smile.
He did grow quiet, though — hesitation furrowing his brows.
“I don’t want to be your friend, either,” he said.
His eyes met mine, serious and intent.
“I… I’ve been there before, and I can’t do it again. When I say this is just sex, I mean just sex.” He shook his head. “We have to stop talking about shit. I don’t want to tell you about my life, and I don’t want to know about yours.”
Those last words stung a little, but I shrugged them off.
“Great. I hate friends, anyway.”
Will tilted his head to the side. “You hate friends.”
“Yep. Isn’t that evident by my Friday night plans?” Again, I gestured to my surroundings. “I hear you, okay? No relationship. No friendship. Just sex.”
Anticipation surged through me as he grew quiet, as the questions died out, as that three-letter-word hung between us and dripped with temptation.
“You’re sure you can do this?” he asked, voice raw and restrained.
I prayed my giddiness wasn’t showing, that he couldn’t see how every inch of my being was on fire at the possibility of what could happen when I said yes.
“One-hundred-percent positive.”
Will’s eyes flicked between mine, searching for cracks, for any sign that I was lying.
I held my expression stone cold and unaffected, cocking a brow in a daring tease.
I could do this. I could be sexy. I could be a teasing, alluring goddess.
Because I finally had my answer.
This.
This was exactly what I wanted, what I needed, what I could handle.
There was no risk of falling in love. There was no risk of letting a man into my heart only to have him shatter it and leave me broken. There was no risk of disappointing my matriarchy, of following in their footsteps when they’d spent my whole life warning me against it.
I could keep my job, keep the money, keep the security.
Keep the power.
And yet, in the same breath, I could have what I’d always wanted.
I could feel what it was to be desired, to be touched and tasted by a real man. Those scenes I’d read in books and magazines, the passion I’d watched play out on television screens…
I could know what it was, even if just for the briefest moment of time.
It was the best of both worlds, and I saw that same realization dawning on Will’s face as he slowly stood, making his way around the table to tower over me.
My neck ached as I looked up at him, and his eyes roved over my throat, my collarbone, down to the gaping neckline of my camisole before he dragged his gaze back up to mine. One thick, long finger reached out, tracing the edge of my jaw as his breathing intensified.
“Tell me again that you can do this,” he husked, and it was both a plea and a last-ditch effort to get me to change my mind. I felt the doubt warring through him, saw how he was tortured both by the thought of walking away from me right now and by walking into a situation that would ruin us.