Total pages in book: 63
Estimated words: 57043 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 285(@200wpm)___ 228(@250wpm)___ 190(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 57043 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 285(@200wpm)___ 228(@250wpm)___ 190(@300wpm)
I don't want to be stuck on the couch all day, so I get up and get myself another cup of coffee. In slippers and my favorite nightie and matching robe, I’m try my best not to think the worst. It’s hard not to though when I know I never should have done that last night. The coffee machine gives a soothing hum as I look out the apartment's windows at the snow that's fallen all over the rooftops of the houses across the street. I try to remind myself that a few minutes ago I was smiling at Griffin’s cheesy joke rather than thinking the worst of the worst.
I can't panic about this. I liked what happened last night. I might have even loved it. I've wanted to kiss Griffin for so long, and all the stars just happened to align, so it can't be a bad thing that I took a chance, right?
It might be a bad thing in the long run. Unless we just keep it a secret.
I sip at my caramel coffee in a bright pink mug with white daisies and go round and round in my head until I can't stand it anymore, then pick up my phone and text Mags.
Renee: I think I might have messed up something
Mags texts me back within thirty seconds before I’m even able to put my phone down. The nerves prick at the ends of my fingertips.
Mags: What happened?
I start to answer her, but I don't know how to explain that I wouldn't have tried to kiss Griffin, except I felt like there would never be another chance. It never snows in Beaufort.
It’s so silly but all I could think is that if it’s snowing maybe I’m dreaming, and if I am it’s okay. I’m allowed to go for it then. The real world can’t hurt me if it’s just pretend.
I don't get away with spending all this time not answering. My phone rings a second later and I answer it as I make my way back to the warm spot on the sofa.
“Hey.” I rub my forehead and pull the blankets tighter around my lap. “Sorry for texting you this early.”
Mags snorts. “It's not that early, but you can't leave me on a cliffhanger like that.”
“Sorry for that, too.” I pick at an invisible thread on the blanket and try to gather my thoughts.
“What happened? Is it your mom?”
“Not this time...”
I take a sip of my coffee just to buy some time. I can tell by the silence on the phone that Mags is waiting patiently for me to speak, but she's not going to let me off the hook.
I clear my throat. “Last night at the bar.” I start but I can’t keep going. We’ve been friends for as long as I can remember. Mags knows. She knows everything.
“You were working last night, right?”
“Yeah. I was working. I guess this story started a few days ago.”
“I'm settling in,” Mags says. I can hear some movement in the background of the call. “Okay, tell me what happened a few days ago.”
“I went in for my shift and I was feeling down about everything. You know?”
“I know,” she answers with genuine concern.
“I just couldn't shake it, and Griffin could tell.” I can still picture him staring at me in the break room, standing so still, and how much I regretted not kissing him after. It would have been so easy. “Anyway, he came into the break room to check on me, and—”
“And you two made out,” Mags says decisively.
I laugh. “No. But there was some...tension.”
“Sexual tension,” she says, still every bit as decisive as she was before and a bit more upbeat now. Her ease helps me relax a touch and I’m able to spit it out.
“I guess you could call it that, yes. We were standing very close to one another. I thought about kissing him, but I didn't.”
Mags groans. “What a bummer…”
“We were at work,” I point out. “My head has been a mess with everything, and I had to get to my shift, and if anybody had walked in on us-—”
“I get it,” Mags says. “So then what happened?”
“I worked my shift and caught him looking at me a few times, but that's normal.” We both laugh at my little joke. I’m more than aware that Griffin is into me. And for a while I was into the idea of him. But reality has a way of reminding me why I can’t have a relationship.
As her laughter tapers off, I watch the sun on the snow. It’s melting fast, and it's so pretty before everyone drives all over it and turns it into dirty slush.
“Okay,” Mags says. “Sorry. I just know he's into you, so it makes sense that he stares at you at work all the time.”