Total pages in book: 128
Estimated words: 125020 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 125020 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 625(@200wpm)___ 500(@250wpm)___ 417(@300wpm)
I pull my phone out and text Jeff and Skittles to meet up with me. I need to clear my head. I have so much going on in my thoughts.
After a bit of back and forth, Skittles tells me she’s on her way to pick me up and we’ll all go to her place. Jeff replies he’ll meet me there—I won’t hold my breath.
He hasn’t been himself and I haven’t had the strength to call him on it. It took some time to get him to open up to the idea of Skittles—he’s still not there. I think he likes that she’s sassy and smart and she doesn’t take his shit.
That’s what I love about her too. However, Jeff has never been good at sharing me as a friend. It’ll take a while, but he’ll come around.
She’s the one person in my life I allow to put me in my place. I’m well aware I’ve become a bigger asshole since the accident. I already know I could have left the shoot without tearing the place up.
In all honesty, it was a jeans ad. Most of my burns were covered. I’ll admit when I look at myself, I know they look worse to me than they truly are. However, it’s people like that exec and my father who make me feel like a living, breathing Freddy Krueger.
I used to be confident to the point of arrogance. If this is Karma, fuck her and this bullshit life she’s handed me. This was my way out.
I was going to make my own way. My old modeling contracts allowed me to tell my father to shove his traditions and expectations. I swear my father has gone from looking at me with pride to looking at me like a nightmare.
The shit that has come out of his mouth. I’m no longer his perfect son. His words have been harsher than those I overheard.
I can’t look into a mirror without hearing him in my head. It makes me see the worst when I undress and look down at my body or at my reflection.
“All that money for nothing. I thought this would be healed by now. I can’t look at you. The cameras will make this ten times worse.
“You can forget all about that career. They won’t want you now. Don’t disgrace our family with this…this Wicker Man portrayal.”
“Grr,” I growl and punch my head. Shoving my hands in my hair, I tug the short strands to hold the tears back. “Shut up, shut the fuck up.”
There’s a part of me that knows he keeps saying shit like that to seal my fate as a Nikolaou-Kylix. However, I may have to become that man. If I don’t figure out what’s next, I won’t have a choice.
Right on time to keep me from spiraling, Skittles pulls up in her BMW SUV. I smile. Her car collection rivals my own untouched one.
Every time I try to drive one of my cars, I freak out behind the wheel. It’s like I relive that night all over again.
She rolls down the window and dips her head to peek out at me. I love this wig she’s wearing today. It falls in layered waves across her face, her right eye barely peeking out from under it. It falls right below her chin at its longest length.
“Hey, you. Are you all right?” she calls out.
I open the door and slide in. The tightness in my chest loosens a bit. The scent of coconut fills my nostrils. Every single one of her cars smells so good, each having its own aroma. Then there’s her delicious scent.
I try to reel in the scowl on my face before I turn to her. When I do look at her, she searches my gaze. I don’t know what she sees, but she reads me well enough not to ask if I’m okay again. With sadness in her eyes, she turns and places the truck in gear.
Another thing I love about her, she doesn’t push me when I’m not ready. There are so many things I haven’t told her about my life, but she’s never forced me to give more than I’m willing to. Our friendship is one of mutual respect.
“One day, you’re going to look back on all of this and you’re going to realize it was all for your good. It may not seem that way today, but someday it will come full circle.”
I snort. “Yeah, sure.”
All of that is easy for her to say. She’s not on the verge of becoming a monster. God, I was destined to be a monster, no matter what.
Maybe I should finally take that trip to Greece to see my grandfather. He’ll listen to me. Maybe he’ll give me some start-up cash to do something new.
My advances for the gigs I’ve missed have been returned and I’m not about to piss away my savings just yet. Not without knowing my next move.