Total pages in book: 68
Estimated words: 61851 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 309(@200wpm)___ 247(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 61851 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 309(@200wpm)___ 247(@250wpm)___ 206(@300wpm)
He paused for a moment, watching her intently, then spoke. “I noticed at the bachelor auction that there seemed to be something between the two of you, and then again last night, when she said to you ‘you might think you got your dream guy, the one you wrote about in your journals’ and that tells me that there must be some kind of history between you two, even though you told me that you don’t run in the same social circles.”
“We don’t,” she said and tried not to wince at the immediate defensive tone of her voice.
His gaze narrowed. “Then can you explain why there is so much hostility and bitterness between the two of you?”
“Honestly, the hostility and bitterness is all Claire . . . and it goes way back to high school.” Jessica stopped from going further, shaking her head and attempting to downplay the dynamic between herself and Claire. “This isn’t something I ever wanted to talk about with you. It’s awkward because she’s your ex, and it’s all just so petty.”
“She fucking insulted you,” he said furiously. “I don’t find that just petty but callous and cruel. I saw that side to Claire after I broke things off with her, so I know it exists, but why the fuck is she directing all that hatred toward you after all these years?”
It was obvious to Jessica that Derek was determined to get answers, and knowing there was no way to get around his persistence, she decided to be honest with him. “She hates me because I’m with you and she’s not. Because she knew, from that journal of mine that she stole from me back in high school, that I had a crush on you even then, and she doesn’t think I deserve to be with a guy like you.”
His jaw clenched tight. “What the hell does that mean?”
Jessica leaned back against the couch, gathering her thoughts. “Back in high school, Claire and her girlfriends made me and Avery miserable because we weren’t like them. We weren’t skinny, we couldn’t wear all the latest designer fashions because of our bigger size, and if any of the popular guys even looked our way, it put a bigger target on our backs. She was the quintessential mean girl, and bullying us was her favorite thing to do. She stole my journal, saw the things I wrote about you as my teenage crush, and exploited it all on social media. She was constantly doing crap like that, but the one thing she did that nearly destroyed me was . . .” The painful memory made her stop.
Derek waited for her to continue, and when she didn’t, he prompted, “Was what?”
Jessica glanced away, rubbing her palms along her denim-clad thighs, her stomach suddenly in knots, which she hated. But she’d come this far, so she revealed one of her greatest humiliations because she knew she could trust Derek. “Claire persuaded a guy on the football team to pretend he was interested in me. He even asked me to prom, but the night of the dance, when I was dressed in my gown with my makeup and hair all done, and he was supposed to pick me up, he never showed. He deliberately stood me up, and it was all orchestrated by Claire. And for the next month at school, I was the butt of everyone’s joke.” She swallowed hard and finally met Derek’s gaze. “And you want to know what my mother had to say about it?”
He didn’t say anything, but she saw the pained look in his eyes, like he knew whatever Jessica would say next would be devastating, and at the age of seventeen, it had been. “My mother told me that if I would just lose weight that I would be beautiful and things like that wouldn’t happen to me. As if it was all my fault that this dickhead stood me up, when all I wanted from my mother was a hug or some kind of comfort.”
Derek scrubbed a hand along his tense jaw, his gaze filled with disbelief. “Jesus Christ,” he muttered. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
“Those are just some of the highlights, and I can honestly say that, ten years later, Claire hasn’t changed.” Jessica absently twisted her fingers in her lap, feeling so vulnerable after giving Derek a glimpse into that part of her past. “Claire clearly wants you back, and she hates that you’re dating me, the one girl she always believed she’d never have to compete with.”
“It’s no competition,” he said huskily, his eyes shining with the truth. “You’d win me every single time.”
Sitting in the corner of the couch, Derek reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her into his arms and against his chest. She went willingly, letting his warmth and male scent soothe her. As Derek held her, he gave her the comfort her mother never had, making her feel safe and whole and like she mattered.