Total pages in book: 69
Estimated words: 66062 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 330(@200wpm)___ 264(@250wpm)___ 220(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 66062 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 330(@200wpm)___ 264(@250wpm)___ 220(@300wpm)
“But you said—” Zain said, his voice rough. “You said you love me.”
“I do. More than is healthy, frankly.” Aiden gave a humorless smile. “I may or may not have been sleeping with your shirt all these months. But a relationship can’t survive on one person’s love. It should be give and take.”
“I can give you anything you want,” Zain said, his hands flexing on Aiden’s back, pulling him closer.
Aiden shook his head, trying to quash the weak, pathetic part of him that was starved for this man and yearned to give in. “I don’t care how rich you are. I want one thing—you, wholeheartedly—but you can’t give me that.” He tried to pull away, but Zain didn’t let him, his arms tightening around him. “Let go, Zain.”
“No.”
“Zain—”
“Fine,” Zain bit off, his expression grim. “I won’t take you with me back to Dubai.”
Aiden’s stomach knotted up. Although it was what he’d suggested himself, irrationally it still hurt that Zain had accepted his decision, just like that, without much of a fight.
“You’ll find us a decent place in this city,” Zain said. “Preferably a house.”
Aiden blinked at him, beyond confused. “What?”
“If you don’t come back with me to Dubai, I’ll need a house here. It’ll take me a month or two to take care of the business I can’t delegate to my employees. You’ll get the house stuff sorted out by then.” Zain sounded so matter-of-fact it was absolutely maddening.
Aiden could only laugh at that. “You can’t be serious. You can’t just—you can’t decide to—to what, move here for…” For me.
Zain’s gaze was very steady. “I can. And I will. In fact, I’ve already prepared for this eventuality.”
“Why?” Aiden said, looking at him searchingly. Tell me you love me. Tell me I’m not the only one who feels like the world doesn’t make sense without you in it.
Zain’s jaw worked. “I got—too used to you.” His voice was stilted. “I tried, but I couldn’t train myself out of it. You made me miserable. I—” His expression became pained. “I’m not good at this.”
Aiden couldn’t help smiling at him, his chest full of raw affection and love.
“You really aren’t,” he said, putting his hand on Zain’s chest and relishing in his unsteady heartbeat. “But I want you to try. I don’t need pretty words, Zain. I just want to know how you feel.”
Bringing his hands up, Zain cradled Aiden’s face and just looked at him for a long moment.
“I feel like you’re mine,” he said, his thumb stroking his cheek and making Aiden lean into it like a touch-starved thing even as bitter disappointment settled in the pit of his stomach.
“Right—your possession,” he said tonelessly.
“No,” Zain said. “As in, you’re essential for me—to feel fulfilled in life.” He said it so grudgingly that it took Aiden a moment to register what he was actually saying.
When he did, he blinked, a grin tugging at his lips. “Aw, are you saying I’m essential for your happiness?”
Zain’s expression was distinctly uncomfortable. “Do I really need to say it?” he said, haltingly.
Aiden’s smile softened. He slid his hand up Zain’s chest and neck to cradle his stubbled jaw. His breath caught in his throat when Zain leaned into his touch. Maybe he wasn’t the only needy one. Maybe Zain needed him as much as Aiden needed Zain.
“No,” Aiden said softly. He knew how hard it was for Zain to be open about his feelings—not only his feelings for another man, but his feelings at all. Aiden had long suspected that Zain’s emotional unavailability stemmed from his mother’s death and how badly it had hit his father, nearly destroying all their lives. After seeing how destructive love and grief could be, it made sense that the young boy Zain had been would learn to guard his heart. If one didn’t love, one couldn’t get hurt, after all.
Aiden stroked Zain’s cheek with his thumb. “But it’ll make me happy to know that I make you happy.”
Dark eyes looked at him with almost frightening intensity. “You do,” Zain said, his voice a little unsteady and rough. “Make me happy.”
Aiden smiled at him, feeling a rush of unbearable love. “What else?” he murmured, threading his fingers through Zain’s thick hair. He couldn’t stop touching him.
“Your cat misses you.”
“My cat, huh?” Aiden said with a wry smile.
Moving his hands to Aiden’s lower back, Zain pulled him closer. “Yes,” he said, looking at the spot on Aiden’s cheek where Aiden knew his dimple was. “He misses you very much. He can’t sleep without you. It’s annoying and disruptive.”
“He misses me, huh? But Zainie is a girl.” Aiden laughed at his disgruntled look. “I thought you’d have gotten rid of my cat by now. You always hated it. Why didn’t you?”
“It’s yours,” Zain said.
Aiden’s throat closed up. He couldn’t help himself: he kissed him quickly, adoringly. “Tell me you love me,” he whispered, despising himself for his neediness but unable to stop.