Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 67905 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 226(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 67905 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 226(@300wpm)
Almost losing her has made me realize what I have. We’re going to start a family soon. I don’t want to be that guy anymore.
How romantic…
Fuck off, Natalie.
My heart dropped into my stomach. Their conversation continued back and forth, messages flying left and right.
We’ve been together for years, and you’re just going to drop me?
We were never together, Natalie.
God, I was going to be sick.
We were just fucking—and you know that.
For years?
I said I’m done. Don’t text me again. I won’t answer.
You’re a fucking asshole, Bolton. I won’t be here next time you get tired of your wife.
Their conversation stopped.
And then the messages disappeared—because Bolton deleted them the second they were finished. When I looked up Carson’s name, it had already been deleted from the phone book. Erased as if she had never existed.
10
THEO
A couple days passed.
Axel called a few times, but I didn’t pick up.
He didn’t come by the house like Scarlett had. Seemed to decide ambushing me was the wrong way to go about it.
When enough time had passed and the steam left my ears, I stopped by his villa. Aldo was surprised to see me, hating it when company dropped by unexpectedly. He escorted me into the study and said he would retrieve Axel.
I stood in front of the cold fireplace and looked out the window, seeing the darkness brightened by the lights of the city. My heart had slowed to a glacial pace, like I was half asleep even when I was most alert, even when I lifted in my gym.
It was a depression I couldn’t shake.
Hurried footsteps sounded down the staircase, like someone was running, and then they grew louder as they approached the study. Axel appeared in sweatpants and a t-shirt that had a huge stain on the front, probably spit-up or food from one of his kids. He stopped to observe me, to make sure I was real and not some phantom. He stayed at the threshold between the open doors.
I stared back before I crossed the study and stopped a few feet from him.
He looked at me, his breathing slightly elevated.
I’d come all the way here, but now I had nothing to say. I’d never been good with words. I’d done my best to say them eloquently to Astrid, but I still lost her. It was even harder with Axel, because talking about feelings and shit with another dude wasn’t my thing. “I’m sorry.”
Axel inhaled a slow breath.
“I’ve just been in a dark place, and—”
He moved into me and gave me a bear hug, squeezing me tight the way a father hugged his son.
I stilled as he squeezed me, my arms by my sides.
“It’s fine,” he said. “Forget it.”
It took a second for my arms to reciprocate, to hug him back and embrace his affection.
He continued to hold on like he didn’t want to let go. “You said I had everything. But I wouldn’t have anything if I didn’t have you.”
“Scarlett told me what happened with Astrid,” he said as he sat across from me in the armchair. “Sorry, man.”
“I should have listened to you. You warned me it would be a bunch of bullshit.”
“That’s not what I said. I said it would be unnecessary bullshit if she wasn’t important to you. But she was.”
“I really didn’t know her that way. Didn’t know her that long.”
“Doesn’t matter,” he said. “It happened so fast with Scarlett. I knew I loved her in just a couple of weeks of us seeing each other.”
“But I didn’t have that experience with Astrid. She was always anchored to someone else. We had dinner a few times and fucked, but our relationship was so restrained.”
“Yeah, I get what you’re saying.”
“So I never really knew her.”
“But you wanted to know her. That’s a big deal for you.”
I took a drink of my scotch. “I sure know how to pick ’em, don’t I?”
“Shayla was great.”
“But she was unavailable from the beginning. Should have just walked away when she told me to.”
Pity moved into his eyes.
“I got to experience the end of a long marriage without actually living it.”
“I know you wouldn’t change anything, man.”
“Sometimes I’m not so sure.” I swirled my glass and watched the ice cubes spin.
After a long stretch of silence, Axel changed the subject. “What are you going to do about Astrid?”
“Nothing. I’ve moved on.”
“You have?”
“I’m sleeping around again.”
“You weren’t before?”
“No.”
Axel smirked. “I knew you were full of shit.”
“I hope she’s happy with Bolton.”
“Is that sarcasm?”
“No,” I said. “I hope I’m wrong about him.” But I didn’t think I was. I suspected Astrid would realize staying with him was the wrong decision, but she would probably have a couple kids by then and be trapped. She’d have to settle even more. Make the best out of it because if she didn’t, she would lose her mind. And I would be…dead or fucking whores and then eating dinner alone.