Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 84295 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84295 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
“She’s gone,” he says, and I can feel his breath ruffling the hair on the top of my head.
There’s a strain in his voice, and I know I should back away, but I don’t. I move closer to him, and a small growl escapes him. I smile against his chest.
I could ask him what’s wrong, but instead I act like I don’t even notice it. I pull back and let my arms fall to my side. I cross my arms over my chest. “Ex-girlfriend?”
He shakes his head, seemingly rattled by all of it. “No. We went on one date. She wanted more. I didn’t.”
I turn away to pick up the packages. “Oh yeah? When did you go on a date?” I ask as innocently as I can. I hold my breath waiting for an answer. It’s really none of my business, but right now I’m imagining all the letters we sent back and forth, and I can’t help but wonder if he was also talking to her all this time. I mean, all we did was email back and forth, but if he has been dating women, maybe that will make it easier for me to walk away the day after tomorrow.
“Over a year ago,” he says, and almost as an afterthought he says, “Before I got your cookies last year.”
I just shrug like it doesn’t matter, but in fact my mind is running a hundred miles an hour. It was before we met.
I turn to him with the packages between us. “So before any more girlfriends show up…”
“I don’t have girlfriends. I told you that,” he says with a blush on his face. At least he’s embarrassed that the woman showed up.
“Right. Well, before any ex one-night stands…”
“I didn’t sleep with her either,” he says, crowding me.
I push the packages into his arms. “It’s none of my business anyway. Here you go.”
He takes the packages, and I walk over to the couch and sit down.
There’s a part of me fuming and wondering if I should just go. If I wasn’t here, would he have asked Jennifer to stay?
Gavin sets the presents on the couch between us. “What are you thinking about?”
I push the hair off my face and look him in the eye. Regardless of how I feel about him, I came here with the main mission of him having a good Christmas. “I’m just wondering if I should leave.” My heart breaks a little even as I say it, but I keep the smile plastered to my face.
“Leave? You’re not leaving.”
I shrug my shoulders. “I mean, I came because I didn’t want you to be alone on Christmas. I wanted you to have a good one. If I wasn’t here, well, if I leave, I’m sure Jennifer would come back.”
He reaches around the packages and grabs my hand, holding it in his. “Don’t even think that way. We’ve had such a good day, don’t let this ruin it. I want you here.” I look at him with a tilt of my head, wondering if he’s telling the truth. He doesn’t want me. There’s no future in this, but he doesn’t want me to go.
What was I thinking when I came here? Did I really think coming and spreading a little holiday cheer and then leaving was going to be a good idea? If he was some kind of asshole, this would make it so much easier.
Gavin
I can understand why she’s feeling the way she is, and I’m cussing myself that she’s been put into this position. She’s been so good to me. She’s listened to me vent, and she’s always been upbeat and happy. She’s worried about me and has sent me so many packages this past year that I’ve lost count. She probably doesn’t realize it, but she made this last year the best of my life.
Even before she showed up here, I was having trouble with our goodbye. Back on base, or wherever I was, there were nights I dreamed of her. Even though I had never seen her before, I knew it was her. I thought about her all the time, and I don’t know why I thought I could just erase her from my memory. I don’t know what I’m going to do now that she’s here, and I’ve seen her face to face. I’ll now have a face and a body to think about, and her curvy body definitely does it for me. I want to say hell with it all and carry her into my bedroom, but one look into her big hazel eyes that look at me with so much trust, I know I can’t.
“I don’t want you to feel this way, Cassie. What can I do to convince you that I’d rather be here with you?”
I know exactly where her mind goes because it’s the same place mine’s been. She wants me, I know she does. Probably as much as I want her.