Total pages in book: 109
Estimated words: 104532 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 523(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104532 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 523(@200wpm)___ 418(@250wpm)___ 348(@300wpm)
He undresses in silence, leaving his clothes where they fall on the floor. He puts out towels and lets the water run warm before he rinses me, making quick work of washing my thighs. After toweling me dry, he carefully peels away the clingwrap, applies ointment on the tattoo, and carries me to bed.
Oblivion is a wonderful thing. I’m already drifting off when he settles next to me in bed. My eyes are droopy, my eyelids heavy, but the last thing I see before I close them is the blue box on the nightstand. The last thing I register is that he didn’t leave the money.
CHAPTER 14
Leon
I wake up early with Violet sleeping soundly in my arms. Her warm, soft body next to me is soothing, but my mind is far from calm. With last night playing on repeat in my head, I haven’t slept a wink.
I didn’t pay Violet to turn her into a sex worker. Never in my dreams would I have imagined that my callous actions would teach her how to sell her body to me and—I can barely think it—to strangers. Recalling what that dickhead in the bar had said makes me go hot and cold. My blood boils while ice simultaneously fills my veins.
Then why did I do it? To punish her. To pretend beyond the sex I didn’t care. Because I didn’t want her to know how much she hurt me. Most of all? To save myself from falling for her. After what she did, I couldn’t trust her with my heart. If I couldn’t trust her with my property, trusting her with my emotions would’ve been a stupid mistake. I paid her, pretending that if I approached sex like I always did, it wouldn’t become emotional. I believed a business transaction would prevent my feelings from getting involved.
That backfired royally.
In my defense, it’s always worked before. But now I understand that the magic of remaining unattached wasn’t in paying for sex. It was simply because none of those women did anything for me.
What I never considered was how Violet would interpret my actions. She’s my wife. Nothing can change that. Especially not an insignificant amount of money left on the nightstand. A hundred or ten thousand, it makes no difference. It was a symbolic gesture to remind me of my resolution and designed to keep her at a distance. She’s dangerous. I knew that from the moment I first saw her. I knew I’d fall for her, and no matter how hard I fought it, I did.
If she hadn’t betrayed me, I wouldn’t have resisted the inevitable so hard. I would’ve gladly given her my heart. It seems I never had a choice in the matter. Even before I spoke to Ash and came to a decision, I’d already laid my heart at Violet’s feet. The betrayal still hurts. I don’t think it will ever stop hurting, but I decided to forgive her, and I’ll stick to that.
It is what it is. What happened is in the past. I want to move forward. With her. Trust won’t come easily for either of us. It’ll take time. Maybe forever. I don’t know if I can ever trust her or if, one day, she’ll put her faith in me, but Ash was wrong about one thing. I don’t require trust for this marriage to work. I can be jealous and possessive as fuck. I can live with that too. I can hire bodyguards and have Violet followed. I can plant cameras in the house. I’ll do whatever I have to, but Violet will remain mine. If that’s the price I have to pay to wake up next to her every morning, so be it.
As for me, I’ll work harder. I’ll be a proper husband and a good lover. I’ll be her protector and her friend. I’ll put this ugly, dirty thing behind us and provide for her every need. I’ll take care of her financially and emotionally. If she needs a hug, I’ll give her two strong arms. If she needs a shoulder to cry on, mine is broad. She can find a place to rest her head on my chest. My heartbeat won’t lie. It beats for her.
A person is innocent until proven guilty. I won’t judge her future by her past. I won’t expect the worst because she crossed the line once. I’m a thief. I’m the last person who can judge, but even thieves live by a code of conduct. We don’t steal from each other. We run in packs, and we’re loyal to our gangs. Maybe this is the part that will be the hardest. To give her the benefit of the doubt. Because what that boils down to is the same thing that started this whole mess. Trust.
Blind trust is no easy feat. Trusting someone with your eyes shut is a contradiction in terms, but I’ll juggle those contradictions and walk on the thin edge of balance. If it takes walking on the edge of a sword, I’ll do it. I’ll do it for her.