Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 97369 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97369 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 487(@200wpm)___ 389(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
“Indie …” Milo says, chasing me toward the blacktop.
“Rae seems nice.”
“Indie …”
“Does she know that you’re marrying Jolene? Did you try to tell her things couldn’t go any further? Did you sleep with her?” I lose my emotional balance, falling hard off the cliff into a sea of jealousy.
“Not recently.”
I spin around, blocking him from taking another step. “So you have had sex with her?”
“Why are we having this conversation?” He frowns.
“Because you kissed me, and you’re marrying Jolene. I think it’s time you set some moral boundaries.”
My last morsel of control catches in the breeze and scatters miles away.
“What do you suggest?”
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out.
“I didn’t sleep with Rae last night. She stopped by to chat this morning. I’m marrying Jolene, but I’m not rehashing the reasons why. So it would appear the only moral boundary I need to set is with you. I won’t kiss you again.”
“Stop. Just …” I blow out a long breath before it suffocates me. “Stop making this about me. It’s about you, Milo. It’s all the things about you I’m not allowed to know. It’s about your indebtedness to Fletcher. It’s about your complete and utter lack of self-worth that you’re willing to have sex with literally anyone. Except for me, of course. And you’re willing to marry someone you don’t love.”
“Are you really giving me a lecture on self-worth, Indie?”
I turn and stomp the rest of the way to my car. “Yes. I am. Thanks to you, I have less self-worth than anyone right now, so I’m a bit of an expert on it.”
Milo pops the hood and inspects things. “I’m not in prison, Indie. I’m. Not. In. Prison.” He pokes his head around the hood and eyes me. “I don’t care where I live. I’m not in prison.” His gaze drops, and tension lines his forehead. This simple change in demeanor sits heavily on my heart.
“I don’t care what job I have. I’m not in prison. I don’t care who owns my debt. I’m not in prison. I don’t care who I have to marry. I’m not in prison. My brother’s on death row. I’m. Not. In. Prison.”
Stone still, breath held, every selfish emotion vanishes. Milo is alive. That’s what he’s saying without actually saying it. Fletcher did something big for Milo. I don’t think I will ever know what, but the unspoken truth is a wall between us. An unscalable wall.
It changes nothing, but it will mean everything.
“I don’t want to be your moral boundary,” I say just above a whisper. One. I have one person in this world, and his name is Milo Odell.
He grunts, returning his attention to my car. “The sooner you realize you’ll never get what you want inside the boundaries of Fletcher’s world, the easier your life will be.”
Emotions knock around in my chest while I stare at my boots and lean against the side of my car. “You. You mean you. I’ll never have you.”
After a few minutes, he shuts the hood. “Start it.”
I inspect him, hoping for a tiny sign of acknowledgment. Pretending the kiss never happened isn’t what I want. The car starts right up. Just as quickly, I kill the engine and brush past him toward the house.
Two feet inside the front door, his hand encircles my wrist.
“Let me go,” I whisper.
“I will.”
When I turn back toward him, he releases my wrist, and my heart sinks in my chest. Loneliness has never felt so instant.
My hand catches his a second later. “Just …” I gaze up at him. “Not yet.”
This is it. Right here. Everything shifts and I know I can’t stop it. I know it’s going to hurt. And I know I’m going to do it anyway.
That’s pretty much the miserable definition of love.
Milo stares at our hands.
“I’m sorry your brother is going to die.”
He nods slowly. Milo has never looked this tortured. “We’re all gonna die, Indie.”
I release his hand and slide my arms around his neck, pressing my face into it, not caring if he hugs me back. “The world doesn’t care about us. It doesn’t wait for us. Why should we care about it? Why should we wait for it? We’re not like everyone else.”
“Indie …” His strained voice cuts into me. “Fletcher will kill me. And I mean that in the most literal sense.” He lets his hands rest on my hips.
“Fletcher doesn’t have to know.” I kiss his neck. “And if the world doesn’t end before summer, I’ll leave. You’ll marry Jolene. We’ll both be miserable.” I kiss my way to his jaw, lifting onto my toes. “But we’ll have the best memories.” I pull him down, softly pressing my lips to his cheek. “Make memories with me, Milo. Be mine … until you’re hers. I promise …” I kiss the corner of his mouth and whisper, “I’ll let you go.” I kiss him again, but he doesn’t kiss me back.