Total pages in book: 19
Estimated words: 22647 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 113(@200wpm)___ 91(@250wpm)___ 75(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 22647 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 113(@200wpm)___ 91(@250wpm)___ 75(@300wpm)
He was so sexy. Even with his ugly brown and green cammies on. Even knowing what they stood for. Knowing that when he had those on, it was because he was about to deploy, and leave me alone again.
“Will you dance with me before I leave?” He asked, surprising me.
I nodded, feeling a sick welling sensation in the back of my throat. “Yeah.”
So we danced.
He hummed ‘Oh, Christmas Tree’ under his breath, just as he’d done the year prior. It was off tune, and sounded terrible, but I could care less. It meant something to me that he’d remembered. Somehow making this whole terrible thing bearable.
We danced for what felt like seconds, but turned out to be two long minutes, because whistles from the men at the gate, his team, interrupted us.
He lifted his hand, letting them know he’d heard them, and looked into my eyes.
“Here,” he said, lifting a folded envelope from his side pocket. “Don’t read this until I’m gone, okay?”
I nodded, giving him my promise not to look at it until his plane was safely in the air. “Promise.”
He smiled faintly. It was a sad smile. A smile that told that he knew what was about to happen, yet not able to do a damn thing about it.
“Be strong, girly girl. I’ll see you soon. Now kiss me and smile for me,” he said as he gave me a long, wet kiss, and then let me go.
I blinked, and watched him walk away.
“I’m leavin’ on a jet plane…” he sang loudly.
I smiled. A real genuine smile.
He looked back over his shoulder twice before he found his place in formation. I knew it was hard for him. Hell, it was probably worse for him than it was for me, knowing that he was leaving me here.
At least he had something to keep his mind occupied. All I had was free time. And I knew exactly how it would be spent. Thinking of him. I hated the US Army. So fucking bad it wasn’t even funny.
What kind of sick fucking joke was it to deploy troops the week of Christmas?
Then I berated myself.
You knew what you signed up for. I thought to myself.
I sat in the bleachers beside my parents as I watched the love of my life stand single file with one hundred and thirty other US Soldiers, all in proper formation, waiting for the okay to file onto the plane.
As the order finally came, I watched as the love of my life, with one final look back at me, blew me a kiss, and then entered the plane.
I caught the kiss, bringing it down to my heart, and making a fist so it’d never escape.
“Oh, sweetie. He’ll be back in no time,” my mother said softly. I ignored her.
She didn’t know that.
I didn’t know that.
He didn’t know that.
He could die over there, and I’d never get to see him again. Then I criticized myself for those terrible thoughts.
I’ll have him home next year. I’ll have him home next year. I repeated those words inside my head, taking them to heart.
This year may suck, but he wouldn’t be deployed two Christmases in a row.
Next year would be different.
The massive plane’s engines started up as the final straggler entered the back of the plane.
Six people ran around the plane frantically as they closed doors, removed the wheel locks, and moved things out of the way so the plane could get out, and take our soldiers off to their next destination.
Then the large ugly green giant started moving slowly down the runway, picking up speed faster and faster until finally it lifted off the ground. It seemed like it took forever to reach the air, clearing the fence at the end of the runway with what looked to be inches to spare.
I watched, my heart in my throat, until I could no longer see the plane.
Then, with shaking hands, I reached into my hoodie’s pocket and removed the note that Elliott said to read as soon as I couldn’t see the plane any longer.
My eyes leaked, and my nose ran, but I read the letter.
Blaine,
No tears.
There isn’t room for them here.
(Did that work, ‘cause I’m sure it didn’t, but it was worth a try.)
But you’re smiling now, right?
I was.
I got you a present at home. I had the neighbor deliver it while I was gone.
Don’t kill me.
I want you to know that I love you with all of my heart, and when I next make it home, I want to start a family with you.
This is my last deployment.
I can’t bear leaving you anymore.
It hurts too bad.
I want to lay down next to you every night.
I want to wake up with you in my arms every morning.
I want to make you green Christmas tree shaped pancakes on Christmas morning.
I want to get yelled at for leaving my gaudy underwear in the middle of the floor, and the toilet lid up.
I just plain want you.
The good you. The bad you. The pissed off you. That-time-of-the-month you.
Don’t be sad, sweet girl. I’ll be home in six months, hopefully less.
And remember what I said about not killing me when you see your Christmas present.
I love you to infinity and beyond,
Elliott
He was good. My tears had dried, and I smiled for the first time since he left me standing at the airport’s gates.
***
“Oh, my…God,” I said as I took in the state of my kitchen.
There was trash everywhere, as well as two piles of poop, and a large puddle of pee.
In the middle of it all was the cutest little Bassett Hound with the longest ears I’d ever seen.
“Oh, Elliott, you little shit,” I said as I got down on my haunches and looked into the cutest eyes, aside from Elliott’s that is, that I’d ever seen.
“So much trouble, Elliott. So much!” I yelled as I scooped the tiny puppy up into my arms and carried him with me down the apartment stairs and to the little patch of grass at the side of the building.