Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 88317 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 442(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 88317 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 442(@200wpm)___ 353(@250wpm)___ 294(@300wpm)
“So you were just two people thrown into the same situation at the same time. I guess I can see how that could happen.”
Maybe that was how it started. But here I was, far away from Carly now and still thinking about her every day, my body still craving her. So this was not exactly situational for me. My feelings for her had crossed over to my normal, everyday life now, too. I guess that’s what happens when someone makes their way inside your heart. It doesn’t matter where you are; they’re there with you.
“Pretty sure I fell in love with her.” Surprised at my own candor, I paused to reflect on that. “Pretty sure I still am.”
“Then why are you here with me?”
Grade F for my performance on this date. “I don’t know.” I shook my head. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” She flashed a sad smile.
Then the next thing I knew, Sydney had tears in her eyes.
“Shit. Why are you crying?”
She grabbed a napkin to wipe her eyes. “Because hearing you talk about her reminds me of how I still feel about my ex-husband. I’m out with a gorgeous man tonight, yet all I’ve been able to think about is Ray.”
Leaning back in my chair, I crossed my arms. “Well, aren’t we a dream team…”
Remarkably, once Sydney and I decided we were a lost cause, we were able to enjoy a meal together. All the pressure of the situation evaporated.
She told me more about her ex, and I recalled stories from Woodsboro. I even told her about the silicone breast insert chicken incident. She cackled so hard I’d thought she was gonna piss her pants.
When we’d finished dinner, Sydney and I wished each other well before we parted ways. I doubted I’d ever see her again, and that was okay. Our meeting had served a purpose; through each other, we’d learned things about ourselves tonight.
I stayed at the table to pay after she left, scrolling on my phone. I noticed I’d somehow missed a text from Carly.
Carly: I miss you.
I rubbed my thumb over the screen, as if to caress those words. Carly must have been thinking about me as intensely as I’d been thinking of her.
Josh: I’m sorry I didn’t see this come in. But how did you know I was thinking about you tonight?
The little dots moved as she typed.
Carly: Can you talk?
Josh: Yeah, give me a few. I’m in a noisy restaurant at the moment.
Newly motivated, I paid the bill and headed out to my car. As soon as I started the engine, I dialed Carly and put her on speaker.
“Hey,” I said.
“Did I interrupt your night?” she asked.
“There was nothing to interrupt.”
“Were you alone when you texted me?”
“I was.”
“You went to a restaurant by yourself?”
“Well, I’d met a woman there earlier.”
After a brief pause, she murmured, “Oh.”
“Can we talk about this kind of stuff?” I asked.
“I don’t really want to, but I also don’t want you to lie to me. So, yeah. Tell me.” She let out a long breath into the phone.
“It was the first time I’d attempted to meet someone new since I came back. And it was an epic fail. I wasn’t feeling it.”
“What was wrong?”
She wasn’t you, I wanted to say. “Just no chemistry. And I didn’t quite feel ready for the whole dating thing, to be honest.”
“I have a confession...” Carly said. “I just got home from a sort of ambush date that Christina arranged.”
Jealousy immediately set in, but I tried not to let it show. “Christina? Dildo Girl?”
“Yup.” She chuckled.
“How did it go?”
“Well, considering I left early and made up a story that I wasn’t feeling well…not great.”
“Wow, look at us, huh?”
“Yeah.” She sighed.
“For the record, I miss you, too, Carly.”
After a short pause, she said, “It’s so good to hear your voice. That’s really all I wanted.”
We talked for several minutes as I pulled up to my apartment.
As I entered my place, she said, “It doesn’t sound like you’re driving anymore.”
“I just got home.” I threw my keys down.
“Do you need to go?”
“Nope. Let’s stay on the phone, unless you have somewhere else to be?”
“I don’t,” she said.
We continued talking as I got out of my clothes and climbed into bed, wishing desperately that she were here with me.
“I went to visit my father in Arizona,” Carly told me.
I straightened against my headboard. “When?”
“Last weekend.”
“You hadn’t seen him in years, right?”
“At least seven years, yeah.”
“What made you do it?”
“I think when I saw your dad at Christmastime, it made me miss mine—or at least miss the idea of him. I decided maybe I’d regret it if I didn’t try to make amends with him.”
“How did it go?”
“He was really happy to see me. He said he’s felt like I hated him, and that had deterred him from contacting me, said he didn’t want to upset me. I know that’s bullshit in a sense, because if you love your kid, you reach out to them no matter what. But I realized over the course of the trip that he has a certain immaturity about him that affects the way he handles things. I don’t think he’s a bad person, nor do I think he means to hurt me. But I also don’t think he loves me the way I wish he would.”