Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 78631 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 393(@200wpm)___ 315(@250wpm)___ 262(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 78631 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 393(@200wpm)___ 315(@250wpm)___ 262(@300wpm)
Zachary sticks out his hand. “I’m Zach.”
“Good to meet you,” I say.
“Miguel,” the other one says. “You can call me Mike.”
“Okay, Zach, Mike.”
“You two show Dragon how things work here,” Leon says. “This is his first meal.”
“Yeah, sure,” Mike says.
“Come on, Dragon.” From Zach.
New meat.
I follow Mike and Zach to the front where a line is already formed.
A couple of older boys shove Mike out of the way. “Go to the back.”
Leon clears his throat.
“Sorry, Leon,” one of the boys says.
“Fuck,” Zach says. “We’ll pay for that later.”
I raise an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”
“You’ll find out soon enough,” Mike says. “Just close your eyes. And remember, one day you will be the big one.”
Present day…
I stand out on the balcony, looking at the dark night. The stars over Taos.
So many secrets I’m still hiding.
As much as I’d like to be with Diana—try to make a life with her—it’s not in the cards for me. I’m broken.
A broken man.
Seeing my mother tonight only confirmed it.
She’s as broken as I am, perhaps more so.
And I hope she is.
She abandoned one child because she didn’t believe in his innocence. I was nine years old. I didn’t even understand what was happening. I picked up the bloody knife because that’s what little boys do. They put their hands on everything. They try to figure things out.
And when their little sister who they adore is screaming, has been cut on her face and on her body with blood soaking through her pink pajamas with little blue hearts, they get angry.
I was angry.
I was scared.
I was just a little boy.
Tim said those things to me so many times during our sessions. Those exact words.
Dragon, you were just a little boy.
I know that.
But my mother and father didn’t.
I always thought my father and I were close. He was the one who saw something in me. The one who said, “Stevie, that boy is going to be a drummer.” The one who bought me my first drum when Griffin was just a baby.
How could he turn on me?
How do you choose one child over another?
How do you believe the worst of your nine-year-old son?
I can never be a parent, that’s for sure.
No way will I risk doing to an innocent child what my parents did to me.
From my balcony, I hear the opening click of the door to Diana’s room, and then a few quick barks from Teddy.
“That’s right, boy, you’re getting a bath.”
Diana’s voice.
Diana’s sweet and angelic voice.
I’m the one who took the dog, but Diana is the one who will take care of him. Nurture him. She’ll make a good mother.
But I would make a terrible father. I don’t know how to nurture. And I know even less about teaching a child how to be a good and moral human being. How can you teach something that you’re not?
I sigh, take one last look at the stars, and then head back into my room.
Chapter Fourteen
Diana
I turn the shower on, and when it’s lukewarm, I find Teddy scratching at the adjoining door to Dragon’s room. He still has the leash and collar on, so I grab the leash and pull him into the bathroom, closing the door behind me.
“I should’ve asked for some extra towels.” I sigh. “No matter. I’ll get some after you are all dried off.”
I lift him into the bathtub, and he whimpers a bit.
“You’ll thank me when it’s over,” I say to him. “My God, you’re a filthy mess.”
Still holding on to his leash, I force him into a sitting position and then run the showerhead over him, getting his body wet. A shit ton of dirt comes off him just from that, and I watch it swirl down the drain.
“My God…” I mutter.
Did that woman never give this dog a bath? For that matter, did she ever feed him? Seeing his ribs makes my heart hurt, but I can take care of that. Soon he’ll be well-fed and healthy.
I squeeze some dog shampoo into my palm and lather Teddy up.
He whimpers again.
“It’s okay, buddy,” I say to him. “This is what it feels like to have someone take care of you. I know it’s all new to you, but once you’re clean, you’re going to feel great.”
I scrub him clean as best I can and then run the showerhead over him. The dirt-filled lather floats down the drain, leaving a thin veil of gravel over the bottom of the tub. I wash it down the drain as best I can and then grab Teddy in a towel. I manage to get him mostly dry until he squirms away and, of course, shakes himself, getting everything, including me, drenched.
He shakes himself again. I sigh and run a clean towel over him. That’s about as dry as he’s going to get. The air will do the rest. In the meantime, though, I don’t have any towels to take my own shower.