Total pages in book: 72
Estimated words: 69610 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 348(@200wpm)___ 278(@250wpm)___ 232(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 69610 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 348(@200wpm)___ 278(@250wpm)___ 232(@300wpm)
I take a shaky breath, reliving the awful moment like it was yesterday.
“It flipped and rolled, and when it finally stopped, I was hurt, quite badly. I couldn’t hear, my ears were bleeding, and my legs were stuck. I kept coming in and out of consciousness. Someone came and got me out. I managed to help them get Caiden out, but something sparked a fire, and the car lit up. He was stuck, and a big portion of his body got burned before we could take him out. We did get him out, right before the car blew up.”
Scarlett squeezes again, this time for a little longer. I stare right ahead and keep walking. If I look at her, the tears will come and I’ll never be able to stop them.
“It was a long road after that. For both of us. My hearing was permanently damaged, but his situation was much worse. He couldn’t walk, and he suffered serious burns. When he got out of the hospital, he had to do intensive therapy and is still only just able to take a few steps. He went into his parents’ house where they hired carers.”
I hate thinking of that awful time when he first got home and everything was terrifying. A new world that he wasn’t familiar with. And a hate in his heart that burned deep for me.
“He hated me. With a fire I couldn’t put out. He despised me and made it known. I had ruined his life. He didn’t want me around. I kept going. Every day. For ages his parents refused me. They wouldn’t let me see him. But I kept showing up, every single day, and finally they decided I owed it to him. So they let me in.”
Scarlett stops walking at a park bench, and we both sit down. She turns to me, eyes sad, face genuine. She reaches for my hands. “Are you two together still?”
“No. We weren’t together after the accident. He told me, in clear words, it was over and he wanted nothing to do with me. Of course, that could be anger speaking, and hatred, but he made it clear and we both knew it was over. I never made any promises. I just wanted to do my part, to stay with him, because he deserved that much.”
“If he hates you so much, why did he allow them to publish that article?”
I shake my head. “I’m not sure. I’m honestly not. Maybe out of anger, that I was starting to move on with my life. Maybe with some underlying jealousy. I really don’t know, all I know is he did it to destroy me. To make me suffer for hurting him. I don’t know.”
“But it wasn’t your fault, Amalie.”
I stare at her, eyes wide. “I caused the accident.”
“No, honey.” She squeezes my hand. “He did. He pulled the steering wheel. He chose to take that risk. Nobody would have been able to control that car. Nobody. You don’t owe him everything you’ve been giving him. He sounds like he’s manipulating you, and sweet, you’re letting him.”
I shake my head, and my eyes well up. “I took his whole life away from him. I shouldn’t have started that in the car. If I had waited until I got home, the accident would have never happened. I was selfish, I didn’t think, and that cost him his entire life.”
“He’s still alive, honey. He’s still here. You didn’t kill him.”
“I as good as ...”
“No,” she says, cutting me off. “No, Amalie, you’re not thinking right. You’re wrapping yourself up in guilt that isn’t yours to take on. You didn’t create that accident, and you didn’t ruin his life. It was an accident. Accidents happen all the time. It could happen to Maverick and I tomorrow, it could happen to anyone.”
I stare at her, and my bottom lip trembles. Deep down, in the darkest parts that I’ve locked away, I know she’s right. I know it, but it’s like my body is rejecting the idea, the thought, because I can’t bear to face the true reality of the situation. And that is that maybe she’s right, and maybe I’ve been living with this guilt for far too long.
But the second that thought comes into my mind, my mind automatically rejects it.
“It doesn’t matter now,” I tell her, because arguing about whether it was my fault or it wasn’t, isn’t going to take away the fact that it happened. “It happened. Caiden has decided he wants me to suffer for it, and he succeeded.”
“He’ll only succeed if you let him. What he said about you was a lie, Amalie. And the only reason it got printed was because they love a good story about me. If my name wasn’t involved, they wouldn’t have given him a second glance and he knows it.”