Husband Trouble (Bad For Me #5) Read Online Lindsey Hart

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Erotic Tags Authors: Series: Bad For Me Series by Lindsey Hart
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Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 77793 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 389(@200wpm)___ 311(@250wpm)___ 259(@300wpm)
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“It could be a thing,” he insists, and given how wide his eyes are, I think he seriously believes it. “Do they have opposable thumbs? If they did, they could probably get that door open.”

“I think the odds of them coming through the sunroof are better.” I shine my phone light on the roof of the car. “Lucky for us, it’s sealed.”

“That just gave me an image of a super strong raccoon jumping on the roof and wrenching it open with its super raccoon strength.”

“You’ve watched way too many movies. Awesome ones. Which ones are they?” I ask, but he just shakes his head at me. I clutch my phone while my heart stops racing, and the adrenaline of the chase settles down to a regular level. But it’s still not the regular regular level since I’m sitting in the backseat of a limo with a man who is crazy hot, so hot that drunk me is freaking proud of myself, and sober me is astounded that I had the courage to approach someone who is somewhere around volcano exploding and spewing lava everywhere on the hotness scale. “Life with your family isn’t dull, is it?” I was about to say him, but I pulled that family thing out of my ass at the last minute.

Orion studies the window, but he’s only half-angled away from me, so I get a lot of his side grin. His side grin is still hot enough to spontaneously combust a normal vajayjay, and I’m pretty sure I have a regular, boring one.

“I’d be a pretty boring guy if it weren’t for them.”

I momentarily panic, thinking he heard my inner thoughts about boring vaginas, but no, I realize he’s just saying that because it makes sense.

He turns to me out of nowhere, and he has this look on his face that is all smoldering and blistering hot, and for just a blissful second, my insides twist tight, and my lips and nipples nearly pucker. Would it be so wrong to kiss him in the back of this limo in the near dark? He is my husband, after all.

It would be level ten out of ten wrong, and he’s not your husband anymore. Technically. But also, technically, it still counts. Papers all signed and sent off—divorce papers.

I give myself a shake and consciously make a point not to look at him. Looking at him seems to be dangerous. “I guess one of us should probably go see if we can get through the front door of the building.”

“That would be me. I’ll go.”

I turn my phone around. “Or we could call someone and see if they’ll come out to the car in a big group of manly bikers to save our asses.”

“That would be totally humiliating.”

“But totally safe,” I pointed out.

“We could make a run for it. If the door’s locked, we could race back to the car,” Orion suggested.

“How fast can a raccoon run?”

I grasp my phone, and I’m about to look it up online when the screen goes black. No joke. “Shit, I guess that’s it for me.”

“And my phone is inside,” Orion says dejectedly.

We sit for a minute in total darkness and silence. I think it might be a new level of creepiness on my part that I like the sound of his breathing. It’s rather soothing, actually. I clearly haven’t been laid in a thousand years. It’s been so long that if past lives were a thing, the past, past, past versions of myself hadn’t gotten laid either. It’s causing desperation and crossing my wires. That’s all that’s going on right now.

“I guess we make a break for it?”

“Count to ten, thrust open the limo door, race to the front gates, bang on them like crazy, and yell bloody murder if it’s locked?” Thrust. Did I seriously just use the word thrust?

Orion laughs. Sweet dragon fruits, the sound is really nice. Deep and full and not at all afraid. Ready for a challenge. I imagine he winks at me, but it’s too dark to see.

“I’ll be a gentleman and go first. If they attack me, leave me behind and keep going.”

I should be noble here and say I wouldn’t leave him behind, but honesty has a time and a place, and right now, he’s just trying to be funny. It makes it so there is almost zero tension between us. Inside me? Yes. But between us? No.

“Alright,” I whisper in reply. “I’ll let them feed on your carcass for days while I go in and enjoy the rest of the wedding. I could send help once I get inside, but I’ll tell them that you took one for the team instead, and then we’ll all mourn your sacrifice when we could have come outside to help you. It will be super dramatic.”

This time, his laugh is so much richer and deeper. “If I have to go, I can’t think of a better way than that.”


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