Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 104766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 524(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104766 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 524(@200wpm)___ 419(@250wpm)___ 349(@300wpm)
Then again, I’m a raging hormone. After all, I was pregnant last week. I literally cannot help this wave of emotion I’m feeling, regardless of how trivial it may or may not be.
Drew fidgets when I frown over at him, and I’m taken back to high school—to the night I watched him from the corner of our basement, during a party, try to hit on one of the popular girls in their grade and she shut him down.
He stammers, “How’s your dinner?”
He talks, but my brain is mush.
This is my childhood friend…
Drew is the boy of my dreams, and now he’s telling people I’m his childhood friend, which basically equates to “this is my friend’s little sister.”
God, I’m a mess.
An emotional mess.
Why couldn’t he have said, “This is my date, Tess?”
Would that have made me happy?
Yes.
One hundred percent yes…
DEAR DIARY…
I thought Drew was coming home for the weekend. I mean—it’s Christmas, why wouldn’t he? So like an idiot, I made an emergency appointment to get my hair done (my roots look terrible) and got a trim, and bought a new outfit at the mall thinking that MAYBE I would see him? The night before Christmas everyone who’s home from college always gets together at the Grain Feedery for dancing and drinks and I’m the idiot because I thought Drew would be there. EVERYONE goes and who doesn’t come home for the holiday??? It’s Christmas for crying out loud. But no. The Colters have that Bowl game they’re playing in so we have to watch them on TV along with the rest of the Nation which isn’t fair, is it?
How dumb did I feel standing around in that new dress, waiting on a boy who wasn’t gonna show up. Dumb.
I give up…
x Tess
CHAPTER 54
DREW
WATCH ME SCREW UP EVERYTHING. SHOW TIMES RUN STARTING AT 7 AM, DAILY.
As I stand here, lacing up my cleats and feeling the weight of anticipation in the air, I can’t help but wonder why Tess has become so distant since our last date. She was one way when we sat down and another by the time we left. Her laughter and the easy flow of conversation still lingers.
Was it something I said?
I rack my brain, lacing my other shoe.
Something has shifted.
It’s as if a cloud has settled over the connection we were beginning to build.
Shit.
We’re preparing for our first scrimmage of the season, but all I can think about is Tess. I find myself lost in thoughts of what might have changed.
Was it something I said or did?
Did I miss a cue that could have led us astray? The rhythmic thud of my heartbeat seems to mimic the cadence of my racing mind, both trying to make sense of this sudden change.
Adrenaline should be pumping, but for a different reason. I have to get my head in the game, or I could end up fucking myself.
Literally.
The camaraderie of my teammates surrounds me, their laughter and banter and shared excitement a stark contrast to the unease I feel. Our team captain tries to pump everyone up, prepping us for Coach to come in and give his spiel before we run out onto the field. The campus pastor is also here to lead a prayer.
Before I’d left the house and left her with Ryann and Daisy, she’d been chatting with them both, wearing borrowed team apparel—one of my hoodies that’s three sizes too big on her.
Her smile was there, but it was different—guarded, maybe forced? I wanted to pull her aside to ask if everything’s alright, but it wasn’t the place, and I didn’t have the time. Now I won’t get to see her again for the next four hours at the very least.
Whatever’s gnawing at her, I hope she talks it through with one of the girls.
They know what this life is like. Who better than brothers’ girlfriends?
What if I’m overthinking?
What if it has nothing to do with me at all?
I mean, it probably doesn’t.
I hadn’t done anything wrong.
But she was so cold last night—I thought she’d at least cuddle in bed? Spoon me or let me spoon her at the very least.
I like to spoon, what of it?
Stop thinking about it.
I shake the dust out of my brain.
Coach’s deep, steady timbre breaks through my reverie. It’s time to focus and get my head in the game.
I direct my attention to him. He speaks words about courage and determination and giving it our all.
“Today marks the start of our journey, the first step toward our goals. We’ve trained hard, honed our skills, and now it’s time to show the world what we’re made of. Remember, the real victory lies in our unity and our unwavering determination. Leave everything on that field—sweat, heart, soul. Play for each other, for the jersey on your back. Trust in the countless hours you’ve put in. Play smart, play fierce, and most importantly, play as one. Now, let’s go out there and make our presence known.” When Coach pauses, you can hear a pin drop. “NOW GO GIVE ’EM HELL!”