How Not To Be A Goddess Read Online Marian Tee

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Oh, shit.

I had almost forgotten we were here under duress, and we absolutely had no time to learn mahjong from ghosts.

Nuh-uh.

No time at all, Saoirse, so focus like a LOTUS, and ooh! That had quite the nice rhyme to it, and I made a mental note to tell Hadrian—-

SQUAWK!

Little Iron was making a racket right next to my ear now, and I threw my hands up in quick apology. "Okay, okay, I get it. I'm sorry I got distracted, I know we're running out of time, so yes, let's go to wherever—-hey!"

Little Iron suddenly snatched the coin from my fingers before flying off at neck-breaking speed.

Why was this bird in such a hurry?

The question raced through my mind as I went after Little Iron, and by the time I finally managed to catch up, we had gone up a spiral staircase and raced down a long, dark hallway that eventually opened to a balcony.

Everything around me was still black and white, and it was eerily fascinating and terrifying all at once. I couldn't even begin to imagine how it would feel to live a life that was entirely without color, and when I finally stepped out of the balcony and saw a monochromatic rainbow curved over the clouds—-

Strange.

This whole world was so impossibly strange—-

Squawk!

The sound made me jump, and I quickly turned towards its direction.

Oh!

The still-squawking metallic bird had perched itself on the shoulder of...

Captain Li Shang?

Hadrian would probably kill me for coming up with another human-and-cartoon comparison, but I sword to Gaea I wasn't being fanciful here. The dark-colored military uniform that Little Iron's new friend wore might be a lot more modern, but everything else was incredibly similar. The long, slicked-back hair. The chiseled jaw. Even the way he was arching his brow at me right this very moment was very much like how Mulan's boyfriend did it, and—-

"Come forward, woman. I am not going to harm you."

The roughness of his tone was impressive (it was almost as sexy as Hadrian's!), and what was up with that lovely accent? I was getting even more Crazy Rich Asian vibes here, with his accented English reminding me of Henry Golding's Nick Young—-

"Did you hear me, woman?"

Shit.

Maybe everyone was right, and I did get distracted rather easily.

But since that was a problem to be solved on another time—-

I forced myself to start walking. Since Little Iron's loyalty wasn't to be questioned, if my pet trusted him, then I figured I could, too. And besides, any guy who looked like a Disney hero should be trustworthy.

Right?

My steps slowed to a halt as I reached Mr. Soldier. "Um...hi." I had the craziest urge to snap my heels and give him a salute or something, but when Mr. Soldier's handsome face remained unsmiling—-

Focus like a LOTUS, Saoirse!

I cleared my throat and tried again. "So, that, um, bird...it's mine—-" I broke off when I saw his lips twitch the slightest bit, and I realized too late how my words could be totally read the wrong way.

"Uh, what I mean is..."

Mr. Soldier grunted, and the sound was so familiar that it gave me pause. I could've sworn I had heard that somewhere before, and...shit, I was getting distracted again.

I gestured to Little Iron, and the magical partridge squawked in acknowledgment. "I was referring to him. That's Little Iron, and he's my, um, pet."

"I understood the first time."

Sure he did. He so sure did, but it still hadn't kept him from silently laughing at me, had it?

"Anyway, I was wondering if perhaps—-" I broke off when he tossed something into the air, and my eyes widened when I realized what it was.

"Is that my coin?" I blurted out.

"Yes."

As Mr. Soldier spoke, the coin's descent gradually slowed to a stop...and it now remained suspended in mid-air as if held by an invisible hand.

"Do you know what's written on this coin?"

I shook my head.

"The characters on it translate to die and kill in your language."

"Uh..." What was he saying here exactly? Was this his way of accusing me for some crime? Was he telling me someone wanted me dead? Or maybe he was just translating the words, and I was reading too much into nothing?

Clearing my throat, I decided to take the diplomatic route and made myself smile politely as I told him, "I'm sure that's just a coincidence."

"In our language, the words would be pronounced as Si. Er. Sha."

Suh-ur-sha?

"That sounds awfully like my name," I said uneasily.

"Do you still think it's a coincidence then?"

I grimaced. "Obviously...no."

"You are taking this quite well," Mr. Soldier noted.

"I'm kinda used to people wanting to kill me."

"Ah."

"But it's not because I'm hateful or anything like that," I added.

"I see."

"I'm not lying!"

Mr. Soldier grunted, and I told myself that was his version of saying he knew I was telling the truth. Which I was. I mean...you guys don't think I'm hateful, right? Annoying maybe, but in an adorable way, and—-


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