How Not To Be A Goddess Read Online Marian Tee

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"Very well." Dr. Ace's voice was unruffled. "While it will require more tests for me to give an accurate diagnosis, from what I can tell...I believe there's a strong possibility that Saoirse is suffering from the most extreme case of menopause."

I waited for the punch line to come. Or for Dr. Ace to laugh. But when he kept looking at me—-

My jaw dropped. "You're serious?"

"Yes."

"B-But...I haven't even had the thing that happens before menopause! And I'm just forty-one. And...and a goddess!"

"I am truly sorry for this, but..." And you just knew it was bad, when Dr. Ace actually sounded sorry, and his tone had changed from grouchy to gentle. "The fact that you're a goddess is actually the reason the symptoms of your condition are likely to be exacerbated."

I could only stare at him, in a stage of utter denial, and the tightness in my chest only eased a little when I felt Hadrian take my hand in his.

It was a good thing neither of us wanted kids, I thought numbly, or this could be a major deal-breaker.

"This situation is obviously undesirable," Dr. Ace said, "especially in light of the other dangers we have to face, but the good thing to keep in mind is that this side effect is temporary. I fully expect it to go away on its own, in a matter of weeks at most. But until then, you must be prepared for the worst."

"What is the worst?" Hadrian asked quietly.

"On one end of the spectrum, Saoirse may suffer from hot flashes and muscle pains, sleeping difficulties, and headaches."

None of those sounded good, I thought, but they were all bearable at least.

However...

"That's the bad end, right?" Please, please say it's so.

"No."

Oh, Dr. Ace. You're only supposed to burst a person's bubble, and not shoot at it with a machine gun until there's nothing left.

"The bad end comes with the possibility of frequent anxiety attacks, such as the one you experienced earlier."

Shit.

"Mood swings are also likely, along with sudden heart palpitations, a low attention span—"

So that's why I was easily distracted...more so than usual.

"Maybe even memory problems—-"

Was this really a bad case of menopause, or couldn't he just tell me the truth and say I could be have anything from Alzheimer's to dementia?

"And lastly..."

My heartbeat sped up, and as cold sweat broke over my skin, Hadrian started stroking my back, almost as if he could sense my apprehension.

"You must be ready to experience—-"

Or maybe...this was already another anxiety attack?

"A vastly reduced sex drive." Dr. Ace gave me a rather apologetic look, like he knew I would find his last words tremendously upsetting—-

I started hyperventilating.

AND HE WAS RIGHT!

Chapter Three

Since I've only been "inside" the bookshop once, I still had Narnai-ish enter-the-wardrobe goosebumps popping over my skin as we crossed its threshold. One moment, we were still in the world of humans. Another moment, and we were In Between.

It meant literally what you think it means: a place that was in between two worlds, and it was beautiful and mystical, an incredibly breathtaking landscape of purple-blue skies and endless sparkling streaks of shooting stars that tiptoed over rugged mountaintops and pirouetted through clouds like celestial ballerinas.

A narrow, barren road stretched before us, and as we started walking, a thought occurred to me, and I found myself tugging on Hadrian's sleeve.

"You know how the Catholic Church has its own liturgical calendar?" I asked. "Or how the Chinese also have their own - I mean, they always have their own versions of everything, like their own Facebook, zodiac signs..." I stopped speaking when I saw Hadrian's silver eyes start to gleam. "I'm rambling," I realized with a grimace. "Aren't I?"

"Just a bit."

"I'm feeling rather anxious, too. Again."

"Remember what Aesculapius said," Hadrian said in his usual prosaic manner. "This is only temporary. Let's just learn how to deal with it, one symptom at a time."

My first instinct was to reject his very reasonable suggestion...just because. But I stopped myself in time, and that was when I realized...

"That's it," I blurted out.

Hadrian raised a brow.

"When I'm having an anxiety attack, I should simply ignore my first instinct."

"I see."

"It should be enough to keep me out of the trouble while I wait this out."

Hadrian seemed to want to say something.

"What is it?"

A smile tugged at his lips. "I just remembered how similarly optimistic I was, once upon a time. I used to believe it was possible for you to keep yourself out of trouble—-" I was already making a face at him before he even finished speaking, and Hadrian's slight smile turned into a full-fledged grin.

"Not funny," I pouted.

"But it is, love." Hadrian pulled me close, his lips touching my forehead in an affectionate kiss, and just like that I could only think of how lucky I was, having a guy like him in my life. Hashtag mood swings, right?


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