Total pages in book: 57
Estimated words: 54028 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 54028 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 270(@200wpm)___ 216(@250wpm)___ 180(@300wpm)
I kissed Kingsley’s neck, having missed him and Tate tonight as well.
“Are all your fantasies coming true, pet?” He hugged me to him.
I nodded and dropped my forehead to his shoulder.
Perhaps I’d never run out of fantasies, but…my main fantasy was this right here. Men would come and go, I figured. Jack had to be my constant. Kingsley and Tate, too, in a way.
“Look at them.” At Kingsley’s quiet murmur, I lifted my head and looked over at Tate and Jack as they shared what I assumed was their first kiss. A tentative, sweet, tongue-teasing, get-to-know-you kiss. While they washed each other in languid movements.
I shivered and stroked Kingsley’s chest. “So beautiful.”
“Stunning.” He sighed contentedly and hugged me from behind instead. “Future’s lookin’ bright, Franklin.”
It sure was, wasn’t it?
Watching Tate and Jack right now almost made me regret declining the invitation to Senseless. Jack and I had decided it was too soon, but Christ… No, it truly was too soon. But the day we were ready, I had a feeling the playtime between the four of us would be out of this world.
This was just the beginning.
9
Saturday was a horrible day to work.
For being in town on a business trip, Jack hadn’t been working very much. A few hours here and there—and he’d used my study a bit. Nevertheless, right now, I wanted him here. It was Saturday. A different universe from the night before.
My whole body ached uncomfortably from last night, though I suspected the unsettlement in my mind made it feel worse than it was.
I folded my arms over my chest and peered out the window again, down onto the empty street, hoping he’d be back soon. It’d felt so wrong to wake up alone. If he didn’t sleep in my arms, I at least wanted to hear him rummaging around in the kitchen.
Neither of us shone in that area, but he was better than me.
In a sickeningly sweet moment of pillow talk the other day, we’d made loose plans to cook together sometime. To learn a recipe or two together.
I sighed and resumed my aimless pacing in the living room and kitchen.
A glance at my watch told me it was past noon.
Memories from last night constantly swam past in my mind, and I swatted each one away. Time was up. No more games and dirty fun for a while. Lily was coming home in a couple hours, so I had to step out of one world and into another.
According to Samantha’s last text, Lily was mentally wrung out, and I’d heard it in her voice yesterday afternoon when I’d spoken to our girl. No matter how much she loved visiting Claire, a few days there drained her of energy.
If Lily wanted to stay with me tonight, I was going to suggest to Samantha that we find a way to be flexible for our daughter’s sake.
We’d decided that I would have her for a few hours today, but the more I thought about it, the less sense it made for Lily to go back to Samantha. Just because weekends belonged to Mommy and school days to Daddy.
To be honest, I wouldn’t mind a vanilla transition of sorts before Jack flew back to New York. Tomorrow was our last day, and it’d be nice to spend it with him and Lily. She adored her cousin “Jack Attack,” a nickname that’d lived on without any knowledge of its origin from either Jack or Lily. If they’d seen my old Commodore 64, they’d look at it with the puzzled expression of anyone who hadn’t been alive in the eighties.
Younglings.
That was what I craved, though. A day with those two. A step away from the fetishes and kink. The week had been so intense that I was struggling to land.
In addition, I had all these feelings wreaking havoc. Feelings I hadn’t asked for, feelings I didn’t know how to process, feelings that pushed me in the opposite direction of my big Post-Divorce Plan. I was supposed to explore on my own, have fun, make more friends, and stay away from attachment. Well, look how that turned out. I was pacing like a madman, suddenly thinking about boundaries and rules, suddenly wanting to submit outside the bedroom to an extent, too, and suddenly wanting to belong to someone.
It was all Jack’s fault. Because he had a way about him. His interest in monogamy was so nonexistent that he made me want to crawl closer to him for a tighter collar. By his not expecting me to fall in line, by not putting that pressure on me, I was coming willingly. Because now I wanted some semblance of a relationship structure to find comfort and safety in, preferably before he left on Monday morning.
I needed his guidance, goddamn it all.
I missed stability.
I didn’t even know when I’d see him again.