Holding Onto Forever Read Online Heidi McLaughlin

Categories Genre: College, New Adult, Romance, Sports, Young Adult Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 86321 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 345(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
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“You’re probably right.”

I pull out my cell phone only to realize I haven’t turned it on since I arrived in Chicago. I stare at it for a good minute before pushing the button. Once it’s through the startup cycle, messages come flooding in. Most are from Dessie, but a few are from Allen Lowe, my agent/manager, asking me how everything is.

“This may take a bit. Can we use your phone?” I hold my phone up and shake it as if this is supposed to alert him to what’s going on. He looks at me strangely and rightly so.

“Pizza?”

I nod and turn my attention back to my notifications. The number of text messages increases, along with the voicemails. I’m starting to think that something is wrong until I open Dessie’s texts and see that she’s being overly excessive with wanting to know what I’m doing and why I’m not responding to her. Scrolling through her messages, they’re whiny and coming off as self-centered. Demanding that I call her back immediately or else. Yet, there is not one mention of Peyton. Nothing asking me how she’s doing or how I’m doing.

I’d like to know what she’s going to do if I don’t call her back. I can’t even stomach reading through the barrage of messages nor do I want to talk to her right now. Powering it off, I slip my phone back into my pocket and try to forget what I saw. I’m used to former girlfriends being jealous of Peyton, but with Dessie, I have really tried to put her first. I love her, but it’s different from the way I feel about Peyton. It’s hard to explain. I would give anything to show Peyton how I feel about her and prove to our families that we should be together, but she rebuffed me the day after prom. I thought our friendship was over, that I screwed up beyond repair. I paced the floor of my bedroom waiting for her to call me before I had to fly back to Portland. When she finally did, the words were on the tip of my tongue, me telling her how I feel yet she reminded me about Chicago and how she was so excited to start school. I couldn’t bring myself to say the words. But this side of Dessie is something I’ve never seen before and I’m not sure I like it.

Quinn gets the food ordered while I try to calm down. Part of me wants to call her and ask what her problem is, but the other half doesn’t really care right now because my best friend is fighting for her life and Dessie should know it’s more important that I be there for Peyton. I’m grateful I never turned my phone on otherwise, I likely would’ve busted in half by now.

I look up and watch as snowflakes start to fall and stick my tongue out to try and catch them. Quinn does the same and before I know it, we’re laughing, our faces are wet and I’m not sure we’ve caught anything.

“I hate the snow.”

“Me too. It doesn’t snow in California,” Quinn points out the obvious. It’s funny, I never thought Quinn would go back there, but it makes sense. It’s where he’s from and only moved to Beaumont because his dad fell in love.

“Portland sometimes gets snow.”

“Do you like it there?”

I shrug. “I do. It’s a great city, but it’s not home.”

“Do you miss Indiana?”

This time I laugh and shake my head. “No, not at all. School, yes, but not the weather.”

Quinn looks down at his phone. “The food should be here in a few minutes.” Thanks to technology we can now time when our delivery will show up. No more ‘old fashioned’ waiting by the window for headlights to appear.

The delivery driver arrives just as we step out into the front of the hospital. Thankfully, we seem to have lost the two men from downstairs, at least for the time being. When we get back to the ICU, we ignore the glared looks from the staff as we step into the waiting room where food is clearly not allowed.

“Eat up,” Quinn says, depositing his armload onto the small table. I use one of the vacant chairs, and as soon as my arms are free, my mom pulls me into an embrace. She doesn’t say anything as I wrap my arms around her. I hold her tightly, knowing that she’s drudging up memories of years gone by.

“I’ve missed you.” She holds my face between her hands and smiles, except it’s forced.

“Season is almost over and then I’ll be home.” There’s a small glint of happiness in her eyes. My mom kisses me on the cheek before being shoved out of the way so Paige can jump into my arms.


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